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What are you gonna wear? Options
Kat
Posted: Friday, October 16, 2009 8:05:23 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/19/2009
Posts: 878
Neurons: 3,389
With all the talk of death and dying and afterlife, I thought I’d throw in
my two bucks.
What about the burial / cremation?
What will you be buried in? A native burial gown perhaps? A tux?
A cement overcoat? A cocktail dress?
Me; I plan on having the chain saw mortician rid my bod of some of the extra
weight I’ve put on in the last ten years.
Then I just know I’ll fit into those black leather pants I bought so long ago
...that with my black leather vest and plenty of eyeliner, I’ll slip and slide
right up to the pearly gates and ask where the hell the bar is.
What’s your plan? Or do you have one?

grammargeek
Posted: Friday, October 16, 2009 8:13:06 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 3/21/2009
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Location: Arizona, U.S.
cremation--no special clothes required
Luftmarque
Posted: Friday, October 16, 2009 8:13:39 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 3/17/2009
Posts: 3,119
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Location: Pau, Aquitaine, France
And I thought this topic was going to be about Halloween costumes! I suppose I'll ask for my Paris subway system jammie bottoms with my favorite "Western" shirt and green Welsh Springer Spaniel Club of America vest. Might as well throw in the cowboy boots too and my Afghani wool cap.

p.s. I intend to attend the funeral in my new Transhuman cybor-body.
Epiphileon
Posted: Friday, October 16, 2009 8:35:58 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 3/22/2009
Posts: 4,293
Neurons: 166,696
grammargeek wrote:
cremation--no special clothes required

On the contrary GG I plan on being cremated but after the fact I plan on "dressing up" quite a bit, titanium, magnesium, strontium and copper, and iron with charcoal. Then all of this along with "me" will be packed, courtesy, well actually there is a fee, by Atlas Co. into one of their finest firework rockets, and launched at my wake.
Geeman
Posted: Friday, October 16, 2009 8:42:27 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/2/2009
Posts: 1,787
Neurons: 125,022
Location: Whittier, California, United States
I don't much care for the idea of family members coming to leave plants to wilt and a headstone that marks the dates of my birth and death: the two days I find the least interesting about my life.... Even worse, I hate the idea of those plaques they use now instead of a headstone in many modern graveparks just so some lawnmower jockey doesn't have to drive around the graves; he wastes a bunch of gasoline motoring his way over the useless grass over the useless graves on the useless real estate so people can waste more gas driving to a place most people don't want to visit in the first place. Eventually people stop even going to the cemetary, but Mario Andretti of the Mower keeps powering on, week after pointless week. Pathetic.

I hate the idea of a coffin preserving my meat and bones for decades or centuries. I prefer the idea of being taken to some place out in the wilderness, buried real deep (just to keep the coyotes off because I don't think we need to feed to coyotes--they get enough of our cats and garbage already.) Someone should then plant a tree on the spot and leave me to feed the worms, fertilized the ground and just melt away into the earth. I don't like wearing suits much now, so I can't imagine why people would think it's a good idea to be put in one for the eternity of death. We come into the world naked. What's wrong with going out like that? Maybe a little shrowd or something for the sake of the kiddies. I understand there's an effort to use certain public lands as burial places so that can be the basis of a claim that they should be preserved. Canvas and soft wood for a coffin. No marker. That suits me just fine.

I would like to be buried with my hands behind my neck in that self-satisfied posture we take on a really good day. None of this "hands crossed on the chest" thing. I've always thought that looked stupid. Hands down at the sides is bad too. That's the pose they ship manequins in. (OK, probably not. They probably ship them dissessembled. But still. It seems like the way they'd ship them, doesn't it?)

Maybe after a slow exchange of elements in my bones, preserving them in some stoney form, an archeological expedition by some of the cockroach-people will dig up them up when they inherit the earth. They could put them on display as an example of homo not-so-sapiens extinctus in one of their eco-friendly recycle pupae indoctrination arks. Little cockroach children could be frightened by my horrific up-down mandible and strange, archetectural bones (compared to their own sensible carapices) while young adult cockroaches pretend to be bored and parent cockroaches explain that humanity died off because it couldn't survive the global crapstorm released by their own toxic emissions. I think that'd be nice.

If none of that is possible, then I'll settle for a Viking funeral. No virgins need be sacrificed for my funeral, but I'll happily accept a few on my next birthday.
Kat
Posted: Friday, October 16, 2009 8:54:25 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/19/2009
Posts: 878
Neurons: 3,389
Geeman ......


You are a riot...you need to take that show on the road!!!!!Applause
grammargeek
Posted: Friday, October 16, 2009 10:00:27 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 3/21/2009
Posts: 11,136
Neurons: 33,836
Location: Arizona, U.S.
Kat wrote:
Geeman ......


You are a riot...you need to take that show on the road!!!!!Applause


ditto
TB
Posted: Friday, October 16, 2009 10:17:03 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/12/2009
Posts: 1,437
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Location: America
Goin out the same way I come in, kickin, screamin and bear ass neckid.
pkeadle
Posted: Friday, October 16, 2009 10:22:34 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 7/30/2009
Posts: 142
Neurons: 427
Location: America
First donate, donate, donate, then cremate, wearing a smile knowing I've saved a couple of lives.
grammargeek
Posted: Friday, October 16, 2009 10:31:42 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 3/21/2009
Posts: 11,136
Neurons: 33,836
Location: Arizona, U.S.
Epiphileon wrote:
grammargeek wrote:
cremation--no special clothes required

On the contrary GG I plan on being cremated but after the fact I plan on "dressing up" quite a bit, titanium, magnesium, strontium and copper, and iron with charcoal. Then all of this along with "me" will be packed, courtesy, well actually there is a fee, by Atlas Co. into one of their finest firework rockets, and launched at my wake.


I love that idea! I didn't even know it was an option. Watching a good fireworks display is one of my favorite things in the world. What a way to go out with a bang.

My mother's ashes are in an urn, awaiting placement in a columbarium that is currently under construction. My boyfriend's ashes have been scattered at sea--well actually the Pacific Ocean. And everybody else I know who has died is in a casket in a graveyard somewhere.

The ashes of two of my dogs are in containers I chose (not typical urns) and are in my home. And I'm almost positive that neither of them was wearing clothes at the time of cremation.
TB
Posted: Saturday, October 17, 2009 12:29:24 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/12/2009
Posts: 1,437
Neurons: 4,277
Location: America
grammargeek wrote:


The ashes of two of my dogs are in containers I chose (not typical urns) and are in my home. And I'm almost positive that neither of them was wearing clothes at the time of cremation.[/color]



My lab is buried under his favorite tree near Monument, Colorado. When I go there to visit,I feel he is still somehow there as a part of that tree. It is a nice place.


peterhewett
Posted: Saturday, October 17, 2009 1:11:51 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/15/2009
Posts: 2,452
Neurons: 3,698
Location: In my head
Many Thai country people keep the bones of their loved ones in a basket, or some sort of container, in a prominent place in the house with big poster pictures of them placed above. I once went to a house where three baskest were lined up and filled with bones of the father, mother and brother of the householder. Each basket had a portrait above... spooky.

Since I will not be at my funeral it is of no concern to me.
reiki333
Posted: Saturday, October 17, 2009 1:46:00 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 7/6/2009
Posts: 154
Neurons: 74,481
Applause Drool Dancing

Kat & Geeman,
Love you guys!Party animals!!! what a riot!
My friend's father-in-law died yesterday ..Interesting thread & timing. This am had a CNN article about afterlife. It is good to prepare, I suppose. I wana go with a bang too!
MissMary
Posted: Saturday, October 17, 2009 2:24:33 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 10/3/2009
Posts: 14
Neurons: 45
Location: United States
I plan to be elsewhere, like Mr. Pease (from an old gravestone): Here lies not the Pease/But only the pod;?Pease shelled out,/Gone home to God.
md56
Posted: Saturday, October 17, 2009 3:08:12 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/29/2009
Posts: 161
Neurons: 500
Location: Charlotte, North Carolina
wet suit
Kat
Posted: Saturday, October 17, 2009 10:34:50 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/19/2009
Posts: 878
Neurons: 3,389
md56 wrote:
wet suit




That might be my son's choice as well...are you a surfer?
Mugly Wumple
Posted: Saturday, October 17, 2009 10:55:56 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 7/11/2009
Posts: 47
Neurons: 150
Location: United States
"In Dead Earnest (Lee's Compost Song)," words by Lee Hays (1979), music by Pete Seeger (1979), copyright Sanga Music Inc.

If I should die before I wake,
All my bone and sinew take
Put me in the compost pile
To decompose me for a while
Worms, water, sun, will have their way,
Returning me to common clay
All that I am will feed the trees
And little fishies in the seas.
When radishes and corn you munch,
You may be having me for lunch
And then excrete me with a grin,
Chortling, "There goes Lee again."
Twill be my happiest destiny
To die and live eternally.
man in black
Posted: Wednesday, October 21, 2009 9:21:23 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/20/2009
Posts: 536
Neurons: 1,334
Location: Cuba
Geeman I guess the poem posted by Mugly Wumple sums up your wish for an unusual burial. There´s another poem: The Cremation of Sam McGee, which is more unlikely to occur, but deals in an interesting way with death and promises made to those on the threshold. I like Whiman´s line of if I should vanished don´t worry, look for me under the soles of my shoes.
There are strange things done in the midnight sun,
by the men who moil for gold;
The Arctic trails have their secret tales
That would make your blood run cold;
The Northern Lights have seen queer sights,
But the queerest they ever did see
Was that night on the marge of Lake Lebarge
I cremated Sam McGee.
man in black
Posted: Wednesday, October 21, 2009 9:45:53 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/20/2009
Posts: 536
Neurons: 1,334
Location: Cuba
I forgot to add that I´ve heard that there´s a painter who´s gaining some notoriety because she uses the ashes of the deceased to paint her canvanses, of course this is upon the requests of the dead relatives. To be honest, I wouldn´t mind that some part of me would feature in a painting, What I´d hate is that the work itself might be of a questionable quality and that if given the chance to behold it I´d rather prefer the coffin than the canvas.

No longer mourn from me when I am dead
Than you shall hear the surly sullen bell
Give warning to the world that I am fled
From this vile world with vilest worms to dwell

No-one like Master Shakespeare to put into words emotions
RuthP
Posted: Wednesday, October 21, 2009 10:32:58 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/2/2009
Posts: 5,408
Neurons: 87,618
Location: Drain, Oregon, United States
pkeadle wrote:
First donate, donate, donate, then cremate, wearing a smile knowing I've saved a couple of lives.

Applause Applause Applause And, that which is too worn-out to transplant, send to research, that we may find ways to cure the now incurable.
early_apex
Posted: Friday, October 23, 2009 4:03:14 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/20/2009
Posts: 2,281
Neurons: 12,855
Location: Spindletop, Texas, United States
Woke up this morning
Put on my slippers
Walked in the kitchen and died
And oh what a feeling!
When my soul
Went thru the ceiling
And on up into heaven I did ride
When I got there they did say
John, it happened this way
You slipped upon the floor
And hit your head
And all the angels say
Just before you passed away
These were the very last words
That you said:


Chorus:
Please don't bury me
Down in that cold cold ground
No, I'd druther have "em" cut me up
And pass me all around
Throw my brain in a hurricane
And the blind can have my eyes
And the deaf can take both of my ears
If they don't mind the size
Give my stomach to Milwaukee
If they run out of beer
Put my socks in a cedar box
Just get "em" out of here
Venus de Milo can have my arms
Look out! I've got your nose
Sell my heart to the junkman
And give my love to Rose


Repeat Chorus

Give my feet to the footloose
Careless, fancy free
Give my knees to the needy
Don't pull that stuff on me
Hand me down my walking cane
It's a sin to tell a lie
Send my mouth way down south
And kiss my ass goodbye


Repeat Chorus
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