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Expertise of 15 lines of technical text ? Options
Arfax
Posted: Thursday, April 18, 2013 4:17:49 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 7/29/2010
Posts: 103
Neurons: 273
Location: France
I got a paper accepted in an international conference (in my town !) but the organizing committee send a very vexing e-mail stating that my abstract requires a "professional translation".
They offer to do it (and charge for it), but I would like experts' advice first.
So, I post my text here, please feel free to make your comments : can it be saved with minor revisions or is it beyond redemption ?
I can provide the french original if you need it.
Thanks for your kind advice !

How different “Urban” stormwater management involving BMPs is from “rural” runoff management ? Runoff processes are identical in both contexts, and urban “source control” facilities have indeed counterparts in rural areas, so feedback analysis, including pragmatic considerations, should be shared more widely. Furthermore, common problem arise for the assessment at catchment’s scale, far more complex than the mere diagnostic of each individual technique. In both contexts, authors study the hydrological behaviour of a combination of works, using simulated or observed data, and draw the same conclusions about the high sensitivity of the result to the spatial distribution of the works and of the rainfall. Modelling is an invaluable tool to assess existing or projected structures, but is a hard task when it involves various and scattered features, and processes at different scales - complexity is thus maximal in peri-urban contexts. Building distributed input for these models is the topic of several recent studies. Both communities can thus learn much from one another, but furthermore they have to work together. For flood risk or water quality issues, urban and rural interests interact on a catchment. Indeed, each sub-catchment is at the same time a source of hazard for the land downstream and of opportunities for solutions. The Flood Directive reminds us to think about and (re-)define the appropriate scale for management.

Shivanand
Posted: Thursday, April 18, 2013 5:05:53 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/2/2011
Posts: 7,902
Neurons: 229,316
Location: Bangalore, Karnataka, India
Hi Arfax, having gone through your abstract, I suggest the following:


You divide the entire abstract into three paragraphs. First paragraph shall talk about the problem/issue you are trying to address through this paper and the factors considered. Second paragraph shall briefly(very briefly) narrate the study/work/analysis done and few major findings. Lastly the third paragraph shall draw conclusions listing out the findings and the suggested corrections/improvements.

May be after you do the above, you can post the same for further corrections/suggestions.


Cheers!
jacobusmaximus
Posted: Thursday, April 18, 2013 6:05:41 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/17/2009
Posts: 13,138
Neurons: 619,123
Location: Glasgow, Scotland, United Kingdom
Arfax- Some minor changes should make this at least a little easier to read.

To begin with, is your opening sentence intended as a question? If so, it should read:
‘How different is urban stormwater management involving BMPs from its rural equivalent? The processes are identical and urban ‘source control’ systems have their rural counterparts. Feedback analyses, including pragmatic considerations, should therefore be shared more widely.
Furthermore, common problems arise with the assessment of catchment scale, being far more complex than the mere diagnostics of each individual technique. In both contexts, the author’s study of the hydrological behaviour of a combination of works, using simulated or observed data, draws the same conclusions about the high sensitivity of the results to the spatial distribution of the works and of the rainfall.
Modelling is an invaluable tool to assess existing or projected structures, but is a hard task when it involves various and scattered features, as well as processes at different scales. Complexity is thus maximised in peri-urban contexts. Building distributed input for these models is the topic of several recent studies. Both communities can thus learn much from one another, especially as they have to work together.
For flood risk or water quality issues, urban and rural interests interact on a catchment facility. Whilst each sub-catchment is a source of hazard for the land downstream it also provides opportunities for solutions. The Flood Directive reminds us to think about and (re-define) the appropriate scale for management.

Edited.

Arfax
Posted: Thursday, April 18, 2013 9:15:47 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 7/29/2010
Posts: 103
Neurons: 273
Location: France
Thanks a lot !

@Shivanand: I can not afford the luxury of breaking the abstract formally into 3 §, there is only one page available for the title + list of authors + abstracts in 2 languages + keywords. I've put some colors hereunder for you to distinguish the articulation.

How different is “urban” stormwater source control from “rural” runoff management ? The processes are identical in the two contexts, and urban BMPs have their rural counterparts. Feedback analysis, including pragmatic considerations, should therefore be shared more widely. A literature review shows that a common key issue is the assessment of the effect of structural measures at catchment scale, whether on flood mitigation or on water quality. In both contexts, studies -using simulated or observed data-, draw the same conclusions about the high sensitivity of the hydrological response of a combination of structures to their spatial distribution and to the space and time pattern of rainfall. Modelling is an invaluable tool to study the hydrological behaviour of existing or projected structures, but is a hard task when it involves various and scattered objects, and processes at different scales - complexity is thus maximised in peri-urban contexts. Building distributed input for these models is the topic of several recent studies. Both communities can thus learn much from each another, but furthermore they have to work together. In many cases, fluxes – flood or pollution- often cross urban/rural limits, and must thus be studied at a broader scale. Whilst each sub-catchment is a source of hazard for the land downstream, it also provides opportunities for solutions. Defining the appropriate scale of work and involving all the relevant services is a prerequisite for efficient flood risk or pollution management.
jacobusmaximus
Posted: Thursday, April 18, 2013 12:38:17 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/17/2009
Posts: 13,138
Neurons: 619,123
Location: Glasgow, Scotland, United Kingdom
Sounds good to me, Arfax.
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