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If there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers. Options
Daemon
Posted: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 12:00:00 AM
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If there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers.

Charles Dickens (1812-1870)
IMcRout
Posted: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 12:51:54 AM
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I am trying to get into the logic behind this and find out what we'd have to do to get only GOOD PEOPLE. But I can't find any solution.

Can anyone?

But I'm sure MTC or kitten will tell us all about the context and we'll be as hopeless as before. Boo hoo!
kitten
Posted: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 1:24:42 AM
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Location: the city by the bay
Daemon wrote:
If there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers.

Charles Dickens (1812-1870)



THe above quote comes from The Old Curiosity Shop--1841--Chapter 56. The story is about a young girl named Nell who lives with her unnamed maternal grandfather. He is a gambler who wants to win to leave her money.


Mr Brass and his lovely companion appeared to have been holding a consultation over their temperate breakfast, upon some matter of great interest and importance. On the occasion of such conferences, they generally appeared in the office some half an hour after their usual time, and in a very smiling state, as though their late plots and designs had tranquillised their minds and shed a light upon their toilsome way. In the present instance, they seemed particularly gay; Miss Sally's aspect being of a most oily kind, and Mr Brass rubbing his hands in an exceedingly jocose and light-hearted manner. 'Well, Mr Richard,' said Brass. 'How are we this morning? Are we pretty fresh and cheerful sir—eh, Mr Richard?'

'Pretty well, sir,' replied Dick.

'That's well,' said Brass. 'Ha ha! We should be as gay as larks, Mr Richard—why not? It's a pleasant world we live in sir, a very pleasant world. There are bad people in it, Mr Richard, but if there were no bad people, there would be no good lawyers. Ha ha! Any letters by the post this morning, Mr Richard?'

Mr Swiveller answered in the negative.

'Ha!' said Brass, 'no matter. If there's little business to-day, there'll be more to-morrow. A contented spirit, Mr Richard, is the sweetness of existence. Anybody been here, sir?'



The Old Curiosity Shop--Summary

The Old Curiosity Shop


Please thank Wikiquotes for the summary and Project Gutenberg for the quote in context and the complete story to read at your leisure.


peace out, >^,,^<
IMcRout
Posted: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 7:04:59 AM
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Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,380
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Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
I knew it. This makes for a completely new interpretation!

But first of all I'd like to thank Wikiquotes, Project Gutenberg, kitten and, last but not least, Charles (Chucky) Dickens.

Second, on behalf of our younger freedelfians, I feel that we owe them a more modern rendition of these lines, which to most of them must appear like some unintelligible gibberish or legalese.

So here is my most humble attempt at bringing ancient literature a little closer to today's respectless, juvenile delinqu, sorry, to today's youth. (Thank you, id.)
I DO get carried away sometimes, don't I?




'That's well,' said Brass.

'OMG', said Cuzn.
(We ought to remind our younger viewers here that 'brass' has a lot of meanings but that it basically is an alloy of copper and zinc - cu + zn)


'Ha ha! We should be as gay as larks, Mr Richard—why not?

'LOL! We'd be as queer as nightingales, Dick - innit?

('as gay as larks' is a rather dated expression and alludes to Shakespeare's 'Romeo and Juliet'.
Of course nowadays everybody knows that it WAS the nightingale, and NOT the lark.)

It's a pleasant world we live in sir, a very pleasant world.

It's an effing world for sure, mate, a real effing world.
(We find Dickens and his sarcasm at his / their best here. It is admirable the way he uses the simple and unpresuming word 'pleasant' in this context in order to show how corrupt and rotten everything is.)

There are bad people in it, Mr Richard,

There's bad guys in it, Dick,


but if there were no bad people,

but if there wouldn't


there would be no good lawyers.

there wouldn't be no no-good liars.


Ha ha! Any letters by the post this morning, Mr Richard?'

LOL! Got mail, Dick?





I am certainly open to any suggestions for improvement.
After all, I am not a bleedin' pommy or and effin' yank, so I might easily have misunderstood a passage or two.
Joseph Glantz
Posted: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 7:51:06 AM
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To change gears a little bit my father, a lawyer, always said even smart people will do stupid things - that's how I make a living.
IMcRout
Posted: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 8:27:15 AM
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Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
JG, I think it goes without saying (well, if it doesn't, I'll say it now) that I do not want to imply that every lawyer is a liar.

In fact, some of my best friends are judges, lawyers or DAs.

But neither can I deny that there is SOME truth behind this quotation I found in the Urban Dictionary:

"Lawyers are the reason there is so much lawsuit abuse. They are the reason manufacturers put common sense labels on easy to use hair dryers that say FOR HAIR DRY USE ONLY. DO NOT USE OR INSERT/IN AROUND WATER. DOING SO MAY RESULT IN INJURY OR DEATH. They are the reason you can spill hot coffee on yourself and sue the restaurant for $10 million. They are the reason a burgler can get hurt invading your home and sue you for his injuries. They are the reason you can get into a car accident after drinking and driving and sue the car manufacturer for your injuries.

Ironically, many lawyers go on to become politicians."


(Thank, or rant at, the Urban Dictionary for this quotation.)
MTC
Posted: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 8:49:25 AM
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Joined: 1/18/2011
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Joseph, you must be braver than Audie Murphy and lonelier than Eleanor Rigby to defend lawyers. But congratulations on your one-line defense and tribute to your dad.

IMcRout should also be pinned with a medal of some type for "translating" Dickens to "Y" and "Z" generations. Was it Woody Allen who said, "I can translate English"? And as I think about it, ever consider starting a "translation service?" You know, something like "IMcRout Translates the Classics." E-book cover with cozy fireside scene of IMcRout reading from Dickens to rapt members of Gen Y and Z.? Something along those lines. Just a thought, mind you.

And while we're talking about Dickens, doesn't The Old Curiosity Shop take its place among the most miserable and unredeeming stories you have ever read? It's certainly the antidote to a good day, if you need one.

floyd
Posted: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 8:51:31 AM
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Friends --

Well, we can't all agree, can we?

Why, I ask, re-write Dickens with a sharp edge? Rewritten, doesn't the sharp-edged lose its fit with Dickens?

So how do we benefit from it? Maybe the "younger freedelfians" among us can use it it to keep up their hormones? In fact, "respectless, juvenile delinqu"ents need many, many things, but I'm not sure anyone needs an IYF take on Dickens? Even if it is "an effing world for sure, mate, a real effing world."

What do others think? IMcRout graciously asks for suggested improvements, acknowledging that he is not a bleedin' pommy or and effin' yank.

floyd


Don't let your cigar go out from bitterness in the hard times to come.

RubyMoon
Posted: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 11:32:58 AM
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This thread is the antidote to a good day, and I didn't need one.

Well, you know what they say-- Those who can, do...those who can't, teach. (Is that it?)

IMc-- I thought the Cuzn was so clever, and thought your post might get cleverer and funner.

I have my attorney present here (just haven't mailed it yet)...

And I will not hesitate to report you to the IIFP ... don't think I won't.

I can best say this in ASL, which I think is one of the most beautiful languages....

Boo hoo! Sick Shhh Silenced Whistle d'oh! Liar Shame on you Brick wall Dancing Speak to the hand Think Applause Eh? Drool Not talking Anxious Pray Shame on you Shame on you Shame on you Shame on you Shame on you Shame on you Shame on you Shame on you Shame on you Shame on you Shame on you Whistle Whistle Whistle Whistle Whistle Whistle Whistle

"effin' yank"?

Bite me.

floyd
Posted: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 12:07:36 PM
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McRout my friend, you are light on your feet and a bit impish today.

Of course, there is "SOME" truth in what you found in the Urban Dictionary. There just isn't much.

Are lawyers really the reason for lawsuits? Or is unchecked corporate power to blame? How much the corporate giants cry and how hard they fight regulation and even accountability! It's their voices we hear, and their unlimited political donations that our government hears. I can't help thinking about what happened in pre-WWII Europe when government and business fell into lock-step together.

As one example or what the Urban Dictionary gets wrong, think about the end of the story of the woman who was badly burned by MacDonald's super-heated, scalding coffee and sued for $10 million. The corporation's lawyers who made sure she got far less in the end. And they are the ones who have made the woman's supposed $10 million a folk legend.

There's a Wickipedia piece on the case that's worth reading. It's a diatribe, but it does make some interesting points. It's at: http://www.hurt911.org/mcdonalds.html

I don't know who's right or wrong in any particular liability case, but I do know how hard it is for the not-rich to get a fair shake these days. "Which side are you on?" used to be an important slogan and is still worth thinking about -- sometimes, when we belittle or sneer at others, we end up on the wrong side.

Pardon my going on so long, but these things are important to me.

Best wishes,

floyd
floyd
Posted: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 12:21:26 PM
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Joined: 5/22/2011
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WHOA!

I just noticed this:

'Ha ha! We should be as gay as larks, Mr Richard—why not?

'LOL! We'd be as queer as nightingales, Dick - innit?'

If this is a clever way of gay-bashing, I don't want anything to do with it!

Am I missing something?

floyd
IMcRout
Posted: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 3:18:51 PM
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Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,380
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Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
Dear floyd,

I have the feeling we're living in two worlds. And I don't mean the two worlds on either side of the Atlantic.

What I am talking about is that some people have a sense of humour and others don't.

I think I have made it clear in many - if not all - of my posts on these forums here, that I fundamentally respect people regardless of their gender, age, colour of their hair, skin or toenails, religious, sexual or political preferences, as long as they show a similar respect of other human beings - and those toenails are consensual.

I do not, however, tolerate religious zealots, racists, fascists or other people who discriminate violently or more surreptitiously against any of the above mentioned groups of people, or others, who I may have failed to mention.

And I also have some problems in remaining earnest in view of people, whose sense of humour is .. now how to put that without incurring further ranting and IMcR-bashing ?? - ... is marginally less developed than that of the average member of these forums.

In these cases I tend to resort to irony, satire and - I'm sorry to say - even sarcasm at times.

OF COURSE I DO NOT WANT TO REWRITE DICKENS! - or any other writer

OF COURSE I DO NOT ACCUSE OUR YOUNG PEOPLE OF BEING JUVENILE DELINQUENTS!

OF COURSE I DO NOT WANT ANY PART IN PUTTING DOWN GAYS, LESBIANS, LAWYERS OR POLITICIANS (and I do not want to insinuate any automatic connection here, either).

OF COURSE I DO NOT TAKE THE URBAN DICTIONARY'S WORD AS THE GOSPEL! - I had thought that my capitalised SOME had shown enough distance.

floyd, you asked, "Am I missing something?"

My answer, Yes, you did.

IMcRout

(Sorry for shouting.)
kitten
Posted: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 8:34:18 PM
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Joined: 12/28/2009
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Location: the city by the bay
Hello IMc,Angel

I actually found your rewrite very funny. Especially the gay as larks nod to Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet, 'tis one of my favourite lines.

I thought it witty putting it into modern speak. But that is just me.Whistle


peace out, >^,,^<
Salma92
Posted: Tuesday, September 13, 2011 10:18:51 PM
Rank: Newbie

Joined: 9/13/2011
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Location: Guyana
It just proves that reality inherently comprises of negative elements. If life went on with only the good and positive, it won't be called 'life' at all...and we wouldn't survive. Even the villains have a part to playThink
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