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D00M
Posted: Friday, December 8, 2017 12:23:59 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 3/24/2017
Posts: 1,034
Neurons: 5,347
Hello respected teachers,

Is the following fine?

In spite of her husband's insistence, Mathilda rushed out of the hall not to be noticed by rich women putting on their costly furs.

I am looking forward to your answers.
FounDit
Posted: Friday, December 8, 2017 2:11:49 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/19/2011
Posts: 8,777
Neurons: 47,226
D00M wrote:
Hello respected teachers,

Is the following fine?

In spite of her husband's insistence, Mathilda rushed out of the hall not to be noticed by rich women putting on their costly furs.


Not really. It's a bit awkward sounding as worded. We don't know what her husband insisted on, but assume it was that she remain. However, she rushed out of the hall. There was a reason to do that but the wording is not natural and could be worded better.

"...Matilda rushed out of the hall to avoid being noticed by the rich women who were putting on their costly furs.


A great many people will think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. ~ William James ~
NKM
Posted: Friday, December 8, 2017 5:03:53 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 2/14/2015
Posts: 4,416
Neurons: 219,801
Location: Corinth, New York, United States
As FounDit says, she rushed out "to avoid being noticed …".

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