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IMcRout
Posted: Friday, July 1, 2011 4:33:23 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,380
Neurons: 563,379
Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
Q: May I call you 'ludicrous' in the forums from now on?

A: Only if you cannot see any alternative.
sisikou
Posted: Friday, July 1, 2011 6:11:37 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/2/2011
Posts: 1,666
Neurons: 4,880
Location: Taiwan
Q: Do you suggest me to buy that painting?

A: Come on Kevin! Are you blind?

IMcRout
Posted: Friday, July 1, 2011 6:22:25 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,380
Neurons: 563,379
Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
Q: (?) Oh sisiku, you are beautiful.

A. I told you before not to call me THAT.
mailady
Posted: Friday, July 1, 2011 8:20:41 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 1/6/2010
Posts: 940
Neurons: 2,752
Location: United States
Q. Hey,THAT,how are you?

A. No,I always use a black pen.
IMcRout
Posted: Friday, July 1, 2011 9:07:37 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,380
Neurons: 563,379
Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
Q: Was it you who wrote ROMANES EUNT DOMUS on my door? In red ink?

A: If you drive straight on at about 70 mph you'll get there in about ten minutes. (Or you can always ask the policeman who stops you for speeding.)
tootsie
Posted: Sunday, July 3, 2011 4:49:53 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/11/2010
Posts: 6,883
Neurons: 23,730
Q. Where is the nearest police station ?

A. but I like the wind in my face
ludic
Posted: Sunday, July 3, 2011 5:48:51 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 12/7/2010
Posts: 1,153
Neurons: 3,544
Location: New Delhi, NCT, India
Q: Oh, for the hundredth time, tootsie, are you ever getting the smashed windscreen fixed?


A: Only if you promise you'll not get angry.
IMcRout
Posted: Tuesday, July 5, 2011 8:56:53 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,380
Neurons: 563,379
Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
Q: Wanna tell me what you did with my granny last night?

A: I never watch crap like that.
TOOTS
Posted: Tuesday, July 5, 2011 10:53:00 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/7/2010
Posts: 1,369
Neurons: 4,026
Location: United Kingdom
Q. Have you seen what's on the News today ?

A. I'm telling you, you will regret it.



Yuzu-ma
Posted: Tuesday, July 5, 2011 3:41:58 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 2/15/2011
Posts: 128
Neurons: 483
Q. Why do you insist not to vote for her to move forward?
A. Unbelievable, Romeo and Juliet reincarnate!
ludic
Posted: Sunday, July 10, 2011 7:25:54 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 12/7/2010
Posts: 1,153
Neurons: 3,544
Location: New Delhi, NCT, India
Q: [After having told my love story,] So, what do you think?

A: I never said that!
tootsie
Posted: Sunday, July 10, 2011 9:26:07 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/11/2010
Posts: 6,883
Neurons: 23,730
Q. You promised you would lend me the money today

A. preferably, under the water
IMcRout
Posted: Sunday, July 10, 2011 10:20:54 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,380
Neurons: 563,379
Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
Q: Are you serious? You fight whole mosquito swarms head-on?

A: No, that's my husband's prerogative.
TOOTS
Posted: Thursday, July 14, 2011 9:58:01 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/7/2010
Posts: 1,369
Neurons: 4,026
Location: United Kingdom
Q. Do you always dress up in women's lingerie to take the dog for a walk?

A. Only if it is televised on News At Ten.
mahinhin
Posted: Friday, July 15, 2011 4:03:19 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/22/2011
Posts: 118
Neurons: 284
Location: Philippines
Q: Will you watch something abou Lady Gaga?


A: Naah! I'll bet your wife won't be happy to know that.
IMcRout
Posted: Friday, July 15, 2011 4:04:43 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,380
Neurons: 563,379
Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
Q: Did you see that TOOTS tried to make a pass at me last night?

A: Yes, I think tootsie and TOOTS are the same person.
abcxyz
Posted: Saturday, July 16, 2011 8:46:16 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 11/13/2009
Posts: 1,056
Neurons: 3,200
Location: India
Q: Have you finally figured it out about TOOTS and tootsie?
A: The 205th.
ludic
Posted: Monday, July 18, 2011 6:39:00 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 12/7/2010
Posts: 1,153
Neurons: 3,544
Location: New Delhi, NCT, India
Q. Which birthday will you be celebrating tomorrow, Dumbledore?

A. There's nothing left to be said now.

TOOTS
Posted: Monday, July 18, 2011 8:22:24 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/7/2010
Posts: 1,369
Neurons: 4,026
Location: United Kingdom
Q. Oh dear, do I really have to explain again?? How I got into a terrible knot registering with TFD, being technically deficient (and as thick as two short planks, basically), and ended up registering both my home computer and my work computer - no cunning plan, no trying to mislead anyone - even made my avatar the same to stop confusing myself. I do hope the "noobee's" on the forum will be as patient as the advanced members were when they stumbled upon me, or rather, I careered into them...... I was a proper klutz, posting topics on the wrong thread, getting the hump with posts that were clearly meant in humour, you name it, I'm still learning - now then - what rhymes with Klutz Think d'oh! Anxious

A. One hooker, a scrum-half and two wings.
IMcRout
Posted: Monday, July 18, 2011 8:55:02 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,380
Neurons: 563,379
Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
Q: So, after getting the hump last night, who did you have breakfast with?

A: I think that's libellous.
mahinhin
Posted: Tuesday, July 19, 2011 6:07:26 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/22/2011
Posts: 118
Neurons: 284
Location: Philippines
Q: He mentioned my friend's name along with the words stupid, moron, imbecile, and all the cuss-words one can think of, in just one sentence. So, what do you say?

A: Yup, that's what love is.
TOOTS
Posted: Tuesday, July 19, 2011 6:28:35 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/7/2010
Posts: 1,369
Neurons: 4,026
Location: United Kingdom
Q. Is it true that this man was shot through the heart with an arrow and then stabbed in the back?

A. Follow the red line for 200 yards
IMcRout
Posted: Tuesday, July 19, 2011 7:04:49 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,380
Neurons: 563,379
Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
Q. How do I get to your mother's?

A. And I always thought 'kipple' meant 'herring'.
TOOTS
Posted: Wednesday, July 20, 2011 12:18:42 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/7/2010
Posts: 1,369
Neurons: 4,026
Location: United Kingdom

Q. Do Androids dream of Electric Sheep ?

A. Just the one slice for now please.
IMcRout
Posted: Wednesday, August 10, 2011 11:34:49 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,380
Neurons: 563,379
Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
Q: You're sure you don't want any more of this delicious horse salami, mylady? It's today's special.

A: I do not think this is appropriate at this moment, Sir Reginald.
GabhSigenod
Posted: Wednesday, November 30, 2011 8:47:22 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 12/22/2010
Posts: 2,371
Neurons: 149,736
Location: Mulroog, Connaught, Ireland
Q: Doest thou wish a wee nip prior to receiving your subjects, my Queen?


A: Well, I sure think it looks done.
jmacann
Posted: Wednesday, November 30, 2011 9:35:47 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 2/20/2011
Posts: 1,296
Neurons: 3,887
Location: Spain
Q: What do you make of that, on this nappy carpet?

A: Still -it is on no man's land.
uuaschbaer
Posted: Thursday, December 1, 2011 6:46:00 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/18/2009
Posts: 1,928
Neurons: 6,180
Q: I think we'd better leave that massive pure uranium meteorite that just impacted over there be, don't you?

A: About quarter of the way in, but only on Sundays.
Klaas V
Posted: Thursday, December 1, 2011 7:14:13 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 7/12/2010
Posts: 1,339
Neurons: 4,802
Q: How far can you enter a protestant church within the Bible belt about 5 minutes ahead of time the preaching is supposed to begin assuming the minister had no need of an urgent visit to the men's room?

A: One, after it you're no longer in the requested condition.
GabhSigenod
Posted: Saturday, December 3, 2011 12:44:37 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 12/22/2010
Posts: 2,371
Neurons: 149,736
Location: Mulroog, Connaught, Ireland
Q: How many days will it take before you swear off booze, again?


A: Pumpkin Pi.
tootsie
Posted: Sunday, December 4, 2011 10:49:23 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/11/2010
Posts: 6,883
Neurons: 23,730

Name a mathematical vegetable (apart from your Maths Teacher, that is.......)

One step, two step, shake it all about

GabhSigenod
Posted: Tuesday, December 6, 2011 10:05:16 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 12/22/2010
Posts: 2,371
Neurons: 149,736
Location: Mulroog, Connaught, Ireland
Q: How does it look as you wind up your hind end?

A: Nose hair.
jmacann
Posted: Tuesday, December 6, 2011 7:39:56 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 2/20/2011
Posts: 1,296
Neurons: 3,887
Location: Spain
Q: What is it you are plucking?

A: Right between the eyes.
mailady
Posted: Tuesday, December 6, 2011 8:52:36 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 1/6/2010
Posts: 940
Neurons: 2,752
Location: United States
What's a concept that Cyclops can't understand?

Next Tuesday,maybe.
kitten
Posted: Wednesday, December 7, 2011 12:23:19 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 12/28/2009
Posts: 2,463
Neurons: 7,420
Location: the city by the bay
But, we'll miss Taco Tuesday, again.


Why won't you go through that door?
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