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Friends to Lovers to Friends Again? Options
iamedge23
Posted: Sunday, March 27, 2011 8:22:45 AM
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"Friendship often ends in love; but love in friendship- never."
uuaschbaer
Posted: Sunday, March 27, 2011 10:57:42 AM

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Perhaps this suggests that you can only like people you don't know very well because when you do know someone well you can only love or hate them. Maybe 'liking' someone is nothing but a manifestation of a hope of one day knowing this person well enough to love them and to do so.
Epiphileon
Posted: Sunday, March 27, 2011 11:12:11 AM

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iamedge23 wrote:
"Friendship often ends in love; but love in friendship- never."

Actually it can happen, though it is rare.
boneyfriend
Posted: Sunday, March 27, 2011 11:14:46 AM

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iamedge23, I disagree with you totally. I have experienced loving someone then divorce then friendship. And many other divorced couples are friends. My marriage broke up because my husband was having terrific job problems and he felt terrible about himself. I also contributed to the break-up by gaining a lot of weight during that period. He left me. We remained friends. My ex-husband was a wonderful fellow. Everyone liked him. He was very kind and helpful to all. He was open to new ideas and loved to laugh. (He died in 2001. I still miss him.) My only gripe against him is the woman he took up with after he left me. She was not good to our son. She was the pits. I don't think he should have stayed with her she was so uninclusive to our son. But that wasn't my call.
Couples can be friends after a divorce or a breakup. It just depends on the personality of the couples.
Christine
Posted: Sunday, March 27, 2011 3:03:58 PM
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Joined: 4/3/2009
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Epiphileon wrote:
iamedge23 wrote:
"Friendship often ends in love; but love in friendship- never."

Actually it can happen, though it is rare.


It does happen!
Yaelyael
Posted: Sunday, March 27, 2011 10:00:52 PM
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Joined: 10/12/2010
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Location: Philippines
It happens... I believe in it.

Friends can be lovers...
If they break...
They can be friends again...

But, it depends on the situation on how they broke up.
man in black
Posted: Sunday, March 27, 2011 10:21:49 PM
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Location: Cuba
It can happen but it seldom does because usually people break up because either one of them is fed up with the routine of the relationship and often the breaking moment has ocurred already before one realizes it inevitable ending. The one who decides to terminate the relationship often has someone in mind to occupy the void left by the person he/she is forsaking because if one is abandoned in exchange of loneliness then one should really worry because one is boring to death. Therefore I think that there needs to be an expanse of time is the people involved in the relationship are to become friends and harbor no hard feelings. The stronger the love they once felt for each other as lover the less likely the return to friendship and the longer the time to heal the wounds.
srirr
Posted: Monday, March 28, 2011 1:24:58 AM

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Friendship after love can happen, if the partners do not carry any grudges. A healthy relationship can see friendship even after break-ups.
ludic
Posted: Monday, March 28, 2011 2:06:28 AM

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I agree with the OP quote. never. There has to be a bitterness that led to a break-up. I would never call a relationship that ended up in a break-up healthy. Former lovers can be civil to each other, but friends in the true sense - no.
Opinions on this vary because the estimation of relationships - between lovers as well as friends varies from person to person. What you may call a "friendship" might not be more than a superficial cordial acquaintance to me.
Wizz
Posted: Monday, March 28, 2011 3:43:16 AM
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Location: South Africa
never say never
maverickwoman
Posted: Monday, March 28, 2011 8:11:45 PM

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Joined: 3/11/2010
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I do not know why but we,humanbeing, are so inclined to generalise our own personal experiences and make it a rule.Considering diversity of personal traits,it looks futile to generalise things. It all depends on the couple and the interactions between them. I remember how bitter I ended up involuntarily with some of my ex-boyfriends that does not let us to be friends no longer.And I also remember I had a few calm and dispassionate relationships, I do not mind being friends with them.Maybe it is a little bit up to passion and intensity of the relationship you have/had, sometimes it can be hard to watch your ex with being someone else for both side which makes impossible to turn out real friends.
iamedge23
Posted: Saturday, April 2, 2011 8:19:15 AM
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Joined: 10/23/2009
Posts: 31
Neurons: 86
Location: Philippines
boneyfriend wrote:
iamedge23, I disagree with you totally. I have experienced loving someone then divorce then friendship. And many other divorced couples are friends. My marriage broke up because my husband was having terrific job problems and he felt terrible about himself. I also contributed to the break-up by gaining a lot of weight during that period. He left me. We remained friends. My ex-husband was a wonderful fellow. Everyone liked him. He was very kind and helpful to all. He was open to new ideas and loved to laugh. (He died in 2001. I still miss him.) My only gripe against him is the woman he took up with after he left me. She was not good to our son. She was the pits. I don't think he should have stayed with her she was so uninclusive to our son. But that wasn't my call.
Couples can be friends after a divorce or a breakup. It just depends on the personality of the couples.



I am sorry to hear about your ex-husband. And yes, you have a point. I couldn't recall who wrote that book but if my memory serves me right, it goes like this: If two lovers, after separation, remained friends, it is either they really love each other or they really never love each other. This is why I am planning not to read books anymore. They confuse me, lol!
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