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My dog was euthanized Options
jagh55
Posted: Friday, November 12, 2010 10:47:53 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/26/2009
Posts: 312
Neurons: 920
Edit: CLOSED/EDITED

My fellow members thank you all for your support and nice comments.
Atiya
Posted: Friday, November 12, 2010 11:34:45 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 7/8/2010
Posts: 2,034
Neurons: 6,093
Location: India
Don't worry jagh55, wherever he is he is very happy right now. He will not blame you for anything young man.



Tovarish
Posted: Friday, November 12, 2010 11:56:49 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/2/2009
Posts: 11,101
Neurons: 39,933
Location: Booligal, New South Wales, Australia
Jag, how old are you and what age and size was your puppy?

This is one great quality of TFD Forum, you always have someone to talk to. Chin up
excaelis
Posted: Friday, November 12, 2010 11:58:12 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/30/2010
Posts: 10,965
Neurons: 32,652
Location: Toronto, Ontario, Canada
I know how terrible you feel; I've had to euthanise several friends over the years - Binza, Jenny, Madoc, George, Sheba, Toby, Suzy. I was with all of them at the end and it never got any easier.

Sometimes you just have to let yourself grieve; no timetable, no rules. Be true to and aware of your feelings and why you feel as you do.

Guilty is normal, sad is normal, angry is normal. Know that your friend never felt anything but love from you, and try to remember a couple of moments of joy that make you smile. It will get better. Promise.
boneyfriend
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 1:22:31 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/3/2009
Posts: 2,625
Neurons: 10,546
Location: Columbia, South Carolina, United States
jagh55, your post was so poignant it broke my heart. I am much older than you and have lived through much and I promise you that you will get through this somehow. Pain when you are young is so staggering because you haven't learned yet that you WILL get through it. As you travel through life and face other painful things you learn that you get through awful experiences and knowing that, they become easier to bear.
But right now you hurt very badly. Just remember how much you loved your treasured dog and relish your memories. Eventually the pain will subside. In the meantime, feel it, don't bury it. I wish you the best now and in the future. You sound like a wonderful young person.
kitten
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 1:27:44 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 12/28/2009
Posts: 2,463
Neurons: 7,420
Location: the city by the bay
Hello Jagh55, Read back the first lines. I don't know how old you are but it was not your decision or rather you didn't have control in this situation, your mother did.

There are animals, who for whatever reason, have a hard time being house broken. There are people who spend hundreds if not thousands of dollars to train their animals in this area. Some pets are just naturally nervous.

I think we all have at one time in our lives believed in or are persuaded by those around us especially those with authority. The key is that at some point we must take responsibility for our actions. However, in this case it sounds as though the decision was made for you. What would have happened to you had your protested? Rhetorical, of course, as only you know the answer.

Did you stay by him? Yes. Do you love him? Yes. Will you hurt? Most definately and for a long time to come.

Anger, denial, bargaining, depression, acceptance are all steps the mind has to process before peace will hopefully come.

Next time you get a pet, and you will, start the routine of walking him or her before accidents occur.

It was not your decision the decision was made for you. It was not your fault. Learn, now, to forgive yourself and more importantly your mother.
worldsclyde
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 2:11:26 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/24/2010
Posts: 785
Neurons: 2,390
Location: Spokane, WA USA
Hi, Jag. I am very sorry to hear your story. I'm a 48 year old tough guy and I still cry for my pets. We can't change the past but I hope this will be part of the man you will be some day. Do good things for those who have no power. Don't hold back your grief. Its the right thing to feel. I just hope you don't have too rough of a journey to adulthood where you can make your own decisions. Like others here have said, we're here for you. Clyde.
Sparrow
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 2:46:16 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/9/2010
Posts: 180
Neurons: 538
Location: United States
Sweetheart, poor darling, see how much support you get! Take mine too! I know how you feel, because I, too, lost my dog last year. I think of her every day, see her in my night dreams, and cannot get over the guilt for not having done for her all I could have. I miss her terribly yet hope that in time the pain will ease and the memories will bring joy.
You know, we adopted a 7 year old dog whose master passed away. The dog was not house trained.
Older dogs are hard to train, and we couldn't train ours either until a vet gave us some advice.
The trick is that dogs do not relieve themselves where they sleep. So what we did is we bought a crate big enough for our pet to sleep inside. He also had two bowls in there - food and water. We kept him locked in the crate for about three weeks. We let him out in the yard three times a day for at least an hour. We made sure he relieved himself and then we played with him for a while, made him have some physical activities - it is very important to let them run around and play. And then back to the crate.
This way, a dog is supposed to develop a habit of peeing and pooping outside only. Ours did anyway. No more accidents! (Well, not that I can see...) The crate is never locked anymore, yet he still snoozes and eats in there. I belive he takes it as his home.
So, if you and your mom ever decide to get another puppy, you may want to consider having a crate.
Be strong, dear! I am sending you a hug. You will be all right.
jagh55
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 3:05:12 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/26/2009
Posts: 312
Neurons: 920
Thank you people so much for all the kind words and support. You have no idea how much your replies mean to mean. When I feel tears coming down again, I'll come here and read them cause they make me believe there's hope. Some of them even made me smile..

Oh right I forgot, just wanted to point out that I'm not a boy, I'm actually a girl. It's okay if you guys thought I was a guy. Weird enough, it's not the first time someone mistakes me for a boy.. Don't know what that's about O_o
Atiya
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 3:11:39 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 7/8/2010
Posts: 2,034
Neurons: 6,093
Location: India
I think it was me who started the thought that you are a boy Anxious Its okay as long as you feel better Dancing




jagh55
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 3:14:11 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/26/2009
Posts: 312
Neurons: 920
Atiya wrote:
I think it was me who started the thought that you are a boy Anxious Its okay as long as you feel better Dancing


It's all right. And I do feel a little better, i think.

Thank you, Atiya.
kitten
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 3:33:45 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 12/28/2009
Posts: 2,463
Neurons: 7,420
Location: the city by the bay
Hugs to you, young one. I have my kitty here and she has now climbed onto my lower back as I lie on my tummy. Animals are special and they calm the soul. Remember the good times you had. You can't change the past..........you can only learn from it and move forward and do not beat yourself up as you were not the one in control. Thinking good thoughts of you and for you.................take care. (((((jagh55)))))


>^,,^<
yeni
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 4:06:02 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/16/2010
Posts: 50
Neurons: 150
Location: Türkiye
I also fell sorry for you jagh55. Your story is tragic and dolorous. It reminded me my first pet.
Time will be your cure.
The.girl.loves.chocolate
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 4:48:07 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/26/2010
Posts: 48
Neurons: 144
Location: Southern Hemisphere - near the Ginger Factory...
Oh Sweetheart,
my heart breaks for you too. The important thing to remember is that not only are you not alone in your grief, that there will always be someone who you can talk/type to, to get your feelings out, but also that you are not alone in making such a wonderful connection with your dog in the first place. Your Mum might have been absolutely at the end of her tether when it came to cleaning up after him...did you know, you can get puppies who are already house trained, and that you can research the things you need to do in order to house train a new one yourself. Be warned, it can be a big job for a little person but if you took it seriously and looked into all the ways there are to train dogs, it would help you with any dog you may get in your life when you are old enough to get one yourself.

They are very different to us, dogs, sometimes people like to think that they are being kissed by their dogs, when their dog is really only licking at the saltiness of their skin...mind you, there are times when they really are kissing us too, I'm sure.
You must think of them as small children, they like to play all the time, even when they are all grown up, and don't understand about going to the toilet in the wrong place, only that they must go now. They also are used to living in groups with other dogs and so they need to know that you are the leader of the pack they belong to, even if it is only a pack of two. If you don't let them know that, then they will try to be the leader, they think they are taking care of the pack when they do that. So they are such beautiful creatures but they are also quite complex and perhaps that's something you might get to understand better for the next time you have a dog.

It's very important for you to never give up on them, never think it is too painful and promise yourself you won't get another. I'm sure your friend would want you to remember him by getting another one, one day. I understand how awful it feels when you miss the only thing you get to cuddle all the time, I, too have lost animals I've loved dearly but how very much you loved him shows you a little of what love is. It's wanting to protect your friend and take care of him...now you know how that feels and so you have learned from having him in your life. We must keep getting dogs and keeping loving them and keep missing them terribly when they die because all that is a part of life.

I won't comment on whether I believe what your Mum did was right or wrong because I believe she loves you with all her heart and did what she thought was best. So give her a hug and tell her she must be the thing you hug for a little, at least while you miss your puppy.
But remember, he is in a good place now, he will never be mistreated or hurt now and he will be keeping an eye on such a loyal and loving friend, and be your silent friend still. The hurt will go away love, it just takes time. So try to stay busy and have a look at what you can learn about dogs, they are fascinating creatures and I am always thankful we have them to share our lives with.
Jo.
Cat
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 7:02:26 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/10/2010
Posts: 967
Neurons: 194,017
Location: Waterloo, Ontario, Canada
jagh55: I once adopted a stray dog who wouldn't potty train. The dog was collie/german shepherd mix and beautiful and loving.

However, I could have her outside all day in the yard and she would come inside and relieve herself. Newspapers on the floor did not help. I was not a "dog" person and had no idea how to train a dog. I was a "cat" person and cats don't need to be trained to do anything.

I gave the dog away to someone who loved dogs and thought they could train it. I don't know what ever happened to it. I learned to never get a puppy since I don't know how to train them, and if I ever get a dog, it has to be trained already. Some old fart who doesn't want to bark or jump on me would be perfect.

It's possible that the dog had a bladder problem that couldn't be fixed without expensive surgery. I say this because I don't think vets are frivolous about euthanizing.

Regardless, the pain of loss is real whether the loss is necessary or not. Being a child and unable to control your environment is crazy sometimes. I recommend replacing the dog ASAP.
B355E
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 8:40:37 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/21/2010
Posts: 355
Neurons: 1,064
Location: Serbia
It wasn't your fault, it was your mom's call to make and she made it, that's what moms do. But, I tell you what you can do - you make an early New Year's resolution never to make your kid(s) sad like this, because once you have your own children, it's going to be your call. And, btw, I was surprised a boy would confess his sadness in such elaborate way at that tender age. Shame on you It's good and important for you to talk about how you feel, you are a brave little toaster. Applause Take care!
HWNN1961
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 8:41:20 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 2/13/2010
Posts: 3,494
Neurons: 9,763
Anyone who has ever owned a pet knows this heartbreak. As said better by posts above this one, your feelings are normal, and I'd add that the memories remain with you forever. You can't rush your feelings, just allow yourself to grieve, and you'll get through this. You have my deepest sympathy.
tootsie
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 8:52:37 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/11/2010
Posts: 6,883
Neurons: 23,730
HWNN1961 wrote:
Anyone who has ever owned a pet knows this heartbreak. As said better by posts above this one, your feelings are normal, and I'd add that the memories remain with you forever. You can't rush your feelings, just allow yourself to grieve, and you'll get through this. You have my deepest sympathy.


and mine sweet, take all the posts above and know you have support always xx
GeorgeV
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 9:01:04 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/3/2009
Posts: 888
Neurons: 2,410
Location: Canada
What I know about dogs is only from quotations, but the very first sentence suggested to me that you were a girl. However "kid" for me is pre-teen, you seem to be much older.
mimosa
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 9:14:49 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 4/6/2009
Posts: 24
Neurons: 72
Location: Netherlands
Dear Jag, I'm very sorry for you to read about what happened to your best friend, but most of all I found your last
sentence -about your mom- heartbreaking. I hope that the two of you will work this out together and she (your mom) will drop the bottle and will be there for you.
I know what I'm talking about, I feel for you, great girl, great heart, so vulnerable; your experience will make you
stronger, I'm sure about that.
And wiser "and sadder", but I think you are young enough to have the flexibility to cope with this sad things in your life.
I wish you the very best.
Mimosa
redgriffin
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 3:52:49 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/3/2010
Posts: 662
Neurons: 223,976
Location: Portland, Oregon, United States
Jag please listen to me very closely. It is not your fault if anything the fault lies with your mother your puppy could be trained or baring that the dog could have gone to a home where it was out doors or it could be trained. You are a good person and an old soul as my mother used to say. I to would like to know your age but from your post I would say you were a young person maybe just in you teens pets fill a part of our life that is very special and some pets are very special and touch us from the first minute that they come into our lives death is never easy but the death of a friend is hardest especially when you think that there is some thing you could do or if ,as I expect happened this time, the being knows we are there and thanks us for our friendship. I leave you with this though "Though there is darkness there shall be light because there is hope. Vaya Con Dios.
jagh55
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 5:52:55 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/26/2009
Posts: 312
Neurons: 920
GeorgeV wrote:
What I know about dogs is only from quotations, but the very first sentence suggested to me that you were a girl. However "kid" for me is pre-teen, you seem to be much older.


A kid for me is someone under the age of 18 living with their parents (a minor who's not able to call their own shots I guess).
jagh55
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 5:58:34 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/26/2009
Posts: 312
Neurons: 920
I want to want you all for your great support.

My Casey is now a resident of Rainbows Bridge, a virtual memorial home for your departed pets. You can visit Casey's rainbow residency by clicking the link below:

http://rainbowsbridge.com/residents/CASEY176/Resident.htm
Sparrow
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 6:23:16 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/9/2010
Posts: 180
Neurons: 538
Location: United States
You make me smile, girl... My dog, too, has a place in the Internet where people can visit her and see her pictures. It is not a special site, simply a post in my blog on the other social site. Keeping such place does give an illusion that the dog's soul resides somewhere out there, right?

Your place is wonderful, so cute and warm. Casey was a beutiful little dog! I love her pictures, I know how it is when you feel like catching on the camera every moment of your pet's life. Keep these pictures. In time, they will bring such happy memories to you.
The page is on my screen now, in a separate window, I am hearing the gentle tune. Very nice!
God bless you! Take care of your mom. She may need your support too.
Tovarish
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 6:54:27 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/2/2009
Posts: 11,101
Neurons: 39,933
Location: Booligal, New South Wales, Australia
The genuine sadness of loosing a beloved animal is heart breaking.

I must confess I was not convinced by Jagh55 from the beginning, and if I am wrong you all have my apology.
kitten
Posted: Saturday, November 13, 2010 7:49:17 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 12/28/2009
Posts: 2,463
Neurons: 7,420
Location: the city by the bay
jagh55 wrote:
GeorgeV wrote:
What I know about dogs is only from quotations, but the very first sentence suggested to me that you were a girl. However "kid" for me is pre-teen, you seem to be much older.


A kid for me is someone under the age of 18 living with their parents (a minor who's not able to call their own shots I guess).




Even when you become older and may have to move back in with your parents you still don't get to call the shots. lol
jagh55
Posted: Sunday, November 14, 2010 12:43:40 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/26/2009
Posts: 312
Neurons: 920
Thank you very much again. You are wonderful people!
jagh55
Posted: Sunday, November 14, 2010 12:45:50 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/26/2009
Posts: 312
Neurons: 920
Sparrow wrote:
You make me smile, girl... My dog, too, has a place in the Internet where people can visit her and see her pictures. It is not a special site, simply a post in my blog on the other social site. Keeping such place does give an illusion that the dog's soul resides somewhere out there, right?

Your place is wonderful, so cute and warm. Casey was a beutiful little dog! I love her pictures, I know how it is when you feel like catching on the camera every moment of your pet's life. Keep these pictures. In time, they will bring such happy memories to you.
The page is on my screen now, in a separate window, I am hearing the gentle tune. Very nice!
God bless you! Take care of your mom. She may need your support too.


I love Elvis' music and so did my dog. =] Thank you.

EDIT: I changed the title because I don't really feel guilty anymore thanks to you guys.
Alias
Posted: Sunday, November 14, 2010 1:53:03 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/12/2010
Posts: 676
Neurons: 1,993
Location: Australia
Hi Jagh,
I am really sorry to hear about your puppy Casey..most of the sentiment I would express have been covered by the caring lot here. I know you are into music big time so I wonder if you know that Rainbow Bridge was a concert held in Hawaii by Jimi Hendrix and that a film with the same name featuring lots of his concert footage was called Rainbow Bridge. He was working on an album when he tragically died ..that album was compiled and released under the Moniker of (you guessed it!!) Rainbow Bridge...

Warmth Alias
P.S. I never doubted for a second that you were a girl...
P.P.S. Where did you get the name Casey from? Was he named after someone?

jagh55
Posted: Sunday, November 14, 2010 4:04:51 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/26/2009
Posts: 312
Neurons: 920
Alias wrote:
Hi Jagh,
I am really sorry to hear about your puppy Casey..most of the sentiment I would express have been covered by the caring lot here. I know you are into music big time so I wonder if you know that Rainbow Bridge was a concert held in Hawaii by Jimi Hendrix and that a film with the same name featuring lots of his concert footage was called Rainbow Bridge. He was working on an album when he tragically died ..that album was compiled and released under the Moniker of (you guessed it!!) Rainbow Bridge...
Warmth Alias

P.S. I never doubted for a second that you were a girl...
P.P.S. Where did you get the name Casey from? Was he named after someone?




Thank you, Alias for telling me about this.

Yes. Angel She was named after one of my favourite actors, Casey Affleck (Ben Affleck's younger brother). My mom didn't really like the name at first but I just knew that was what I wanted to name my puppy. I wanted the name to mean something special and have a reason behind choosing it. I didn't want to just pull a name from out of the blue or use a list of animal names.
Tovarish
Posted: Sunday, November 14, 2010 5:33:12 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/2/2009
Posts: 11,101
Neurons: 39,933
Location: Booligal, New South Wales, Australia
Jagh55, can we keep to the story please, your puppy was a he in your first posting, now she is a she.

I have been trying to drop subtle hints but no one has picked them up.

Sparrow
Posted: Sunday, November 14, 2010 7:20:38 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/9/2010
Posts: 180
Neurons: 538
Location: United States
Tovarish wrote:
Jagh55, can we keep to the story please, your puppy was a he in your first posting, now she is a she.

I have been trying to drop subtle hints but no one has picked them up.


Oh no! I see that too now. Think
Alias
Posted: Sunday, November 14, 2010 9:21:23 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/12/2010
Posts: 676
Neurons: 1,993
Location: Australia
Tovarish wrote:
The genuine sadness of loosing a beloved animal is heart breaking.

I must confess I was not convinced by Jagh55 from the beginning, and if I am wrong you all have my apology.



Wow Tov! it seems you were on the ball all along. I didnt even notice your earlier post (above) doubting the veracity of the story. What was it about Jags story didnt ring true when you first read it? Or was it just your canny, country intuition being around horses and other animals so much??? Its sad if in fact there is no truth to the story but it certainly brought out the caring side of so may contributers..It has been an interesting experience nonetheless. I do however think there is more to this than meets the eye...and I for one take no umbrage....Human beings are, funny complex animals.


Tovarish
Posted: Sunday, November 14, 2010 11:35:48 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/2/2009
Posts: 11,101
Neurons: 39,933
Location: Booligal, New South Wales, Australia
Animal Intuition!!

The first posting didn't ring right to me, as I, and my family have had horses, dogs and all breeds of stock for generations.

So my antenna is pretty well tuned to real suffering and loss.

The really sad part was the true feelings our fellow posters offered Jagh55.
B355E
Posted: Sunday, November 14, 2010 11:47:39 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/21/2010
Posts: 355
Neurons: 1,064
Location: Serbia
Wow, Tov, great call! Applause
But, now I keep wondering what was the point of this thread? Attracting attention? Not a kid at all? Hmmm...


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