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Profile: Nikitus
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User Name: Nikitus
Forum Rank: Advanced Member
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Gender: Male
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Joined: Tuesday, September 17, 2013
Last Visit: Thursday, December 27, 2018 2:06:51 PM
Number of Posts: 375
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  Last 10 Posts
Topic: When he set out on the path he knew
Posted: Thursday, December 27, 2018 8:49:47 AM
Are the following sentences grammatically correct?


Is it he set out on thr path grammatically correct?

Is it he knew by heart nad probably walk with his eyes closed grammatically correct?

Is it he felt that addictive sense of calm grammtically correct?

Is it everything was in place, fitting perfectly, as it should be grammatically correct?

Is it each step he took, he watched everything remain the same grammatically correct?

Is it which remained unchanged and silent, shaping the essence of the city grammatically correct?

Thanks.
Topic: When he set out on the path he knew
Posted: Wednesday, December 26, 2018 10:42:16 PM
Hello.

First of all, thanks for all your help. I wish you had a Merry Christmas!

I want to ask about the following:

"When he set out on the path he knew by heart and could probably walk with his eyes closed, he felt that addictive sense of tranquility that everything was in place, fitting perfectly, as it should be. At each step he took, he watched everything remain the same, streets, houses, buildings and shops, which remained unchanged and silent, shaping the essence of the city."

Thanks.
Topic: Upon finding his precious sneakers
Posted: Monday, December 17, 2018 10:16:01 PM
Parpar1836 wrote:
I'm assuming that "Jack," the guy who lost and found his sneakers, has a housemate named Jeff.

No name-switching at play here; I'm just trying to make sense of the grammar. Of course, Jack would be brushing his teeth in the bathroom . . . a convenient place for the mirror that Nikitus describes.



First of all, thanks for all your help. Sorry for the confusion, I was trying to describe the daily routine (and bizarre world) of just one person.

Thanks.
Topic: Upon finding his precious sneakers
Posted: Monday, December 17, 2018 10:14:20 PM
FounDit wrote:
Parpar1836 wrote:

Is his name Jeff or Jack? On another point, he was brushing his teeth. Where was he brushing his teeth? I ask because you then say he entered the bathroom. And once again, he changed his name from Jack to Jeff.


I think you mean it this was:


Now that he had found his precious sneakers, Jack felt immensely relieved and reverted to his daily routine. As he was brushing his teeth in the bathroom, he looked directly into the mirror, raised his right hand and said, "Jeff! (Jack! One of these)"



Sorry for the confusion. I am trying to describe the daily routine of just one person. The name is Ted.

Thanks.
Topic: Upon finding his precious sneakers
Posted: Monday, December 17, 2018 10:05:02 PM
Romany wrote:

Also:"Once it was almost complete, Jeff, before leaving..." is confusing.

The almost-completion of his routine for the day, and the time he left the house are two different time periods.

He could have "almost-completed" his routine - but it could take another hour to completely finish. We have no idea how long his routine takes so saying it was nearing completion doesn't tell the reader anything. It's vague and pretty meaningless, really.

Yes, you are right. I will work to fix that.


Whereas "before leaving" is specific. It's the period when everything is finished and he's about to walk out the house. That makes sense. It's also a very common - if not universal - action: we all tend to check ourselves quickly before we leave to make sure our jumper isn't on inside out, or our dress isn't tucked into our knickers!

Yes, you are right.


As it stands what's being said is that at some vague, unspecified time - but before he was ready (he hadn't completed his routine) - he checked in the mirror...but ALSO when everything was done and he was ready to go he checked in the mirror. It has to be one or the other.


I understand. I wanted to describe a person who probably has some type of obsessive-compulsive disorder and also he self-impose determinated actions to his daily routine.


I'd advise "before he left" as that's a common action that everyone understands.
Topic: Upon finding his precious sneakers
Posted: Wednesday, December 12, 2018 8:55:24 PM
Hello.

First of all, thanks for all your time and help.

Are the following sentences grammatically correct?

"Upon finding his precious sneakers, he felt relieved and went back to his daily routine. Once it was almost complete, Jeff, before leaving, went to his room and looked directly in the mirror. He pointed with the index finger of his right hand and said "Jeff".

Thanks.
Topic: Taking a deep breath he went
Posted: Thursday, December 6, 2018 8:48:37 PM
Hello

Once again, thanks for all your help and time.

Are the following sentences grammatically correct?

"Taking a deep breath he went to the kitchen. When he was heading towards that place, he hited, accidentally, something with his feet. Upon finding his precious snickers, he felt relieved and went back to his daily routine. Before leaving, Jeff went to his room and looked directly in the mirror."

Thanks.
Topic: His face changed when he didn't find his favorite shoes
Posted: Wednesday, November 21, 2018 9:39:25 PM
First of all, I want to sincerely thank the help of Parpar1836 and Romany.

Excuse me if I repeated a sentence I had already consulted before.

Within my consultations, I have noticed that I have been told that my style (as well as agglutinate too many things in a single sentence) is impractical and uses too many expressions to explain something.

I think that may be the cause of not being able to express myself properly in english language. However, I also think that spanish is a language that in itself is less practical than english and maybe it takes more words to say something specific.

Personally, I appreciate the help and suggestions of Parpar1836, who has a natural talent for writing. His style seems elegant and inspiring to me.

Sincerily

Nicolás
Topic: His face changed when he didn't find his favorite shoes
Posted: Tuesday, November 20, 2018 9:44:18 PM
Hello

Thanks for helping me to improve my written english.

I want to ask about the following:

"His face changed when he didn't find his favorite shoes, begining a desperate search for his entire room, between his shoes, clothes and under the bed which greatly increased his anxiety. Taking a deep breath he went to the kitchen. When he was heading towards that place, Ted hited, accidentally, something with his feet."

Thanks.
Topic: His face changed when he didn't find his favorite shoes
Posted: Thursday, November 8, 2018 11:26:56 PM
Hello.

First of all, thanks for all your time and help.

I want to ask about the following sentences.

"His face changed when he didn't find his favorite shoes, begining a desperate search for his entire room, between his shoes, clothes, under the bed which greatly increased his anxiety."

Thanks.

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