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Help with a problem. Options
fruitjam
Posted: Monday, December 28, 2009 4:24:08 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/29/2009
Posts: 92
Neurons: 268
Friends,

Is the following construction correct? Can it be possibly altered to make it sound any better, assuming that it is correct in the first place?

Quote:
Dear Barry,

Please could you help out Sue with her PC problem, and revert with your feedback on this issue.

Thanks.
Jamie


Respectfully yours,
Fj
SnehaJain
Posted: Monday, December 28, 2009 5:05:19 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/21/2009
Posts: 86
Neurons: 246
Location: Madras, India
Probably you can remove the words 'could you'

Some days you are the statue ..some days, the pigeon.
fruitjam
Posted: Monday, December 28, 2009 5:08:57 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/29/2009
Posts: 92
Neurons: 268
SnehaJain wrote:
Probably you can remove the words 'could you'


Ok. That is an option.

I was actually thinking whether this part of the sentence sounds right and is correct -
Quote:
help out Sue with her PC problem


Respectfully yours,
Fj
Christine
Posted: Monday, December 28, 2009 5:58:34 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/3/2009
Posts: 3,923
Neurons: 15,842
fruitjam wrote:
Friends,

Is the following construction correct? Can it be possibly altered to make it sound any better, assuming that it is correct in the first place?

Quote:
Dear Barry,

Please could you help out Sue with her PC problem, and revert with your feedback on this issue.

Thanks.
Jamie


Please help Sue with her PC problem. Your feedback on this issue will be appreciated.

I am carrying my heart~I am carrying my rhythm~I am carrying my prayers~But you can't kill my spirit~It's soaring and strong (Paula Cole's Me Lyrics)***We are not human beings having a spiritual experience. We ARE spirtual beings having a human experience.(T.deChardin)***There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle. (Albert Einstein)



fruitjam
Posted: Monday, December 28, 2009 8:03:03 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/29/2009
Posts: 92
Neurons: 268
Thank you.

Respectfully yours,
Fj
Romany
Posted: Monday, December 28, 2009 12:02:14 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/14/2009
Posts: 15,920
Neurons: 50,417
Location: Brighton, England, United Kingdom
Fruitjam - your use of the word "revert" is not quite correct. I am unaware of course of what your Dictionary source gave you for this word... but the correct sense of this word is to return to a previous state.

Christine's phrasing above where the word "feedback" was used was perfect, but if you want to retain your original construction you could say: - "...and get back to me with your feedback...".

The use of Please at the beginning of the sentence is not incorrect but is more a child's construction than an adult's. "Could you please help Sue out...." would be the more usual way to go.

The idiom "to help someone out" replaces the word "someone" with the person's name if we are referring to someone in particular.
kingfisher
Posted: Monday, December 28, 2009 2:16:38 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 12/15/2009
Posts: 208
Neurons: 633
Location: United States
fruitjam wrote:
SnehaJain wrote:
Probably you can remove the words 'could you'


Ok. That is an option.

I was actually thinking whether this part of the sentence sounds right and is correct -
Quote:
help out Sue with her PC problem


"Help out Sue" is an awkward construction, at best. Colloquially most native American speakers would say "help Sue out" rather than "help out Sue." Formally, the word "out" adds little (if anything) to the phrase, and would be best omitted.
Clement
Posted: Monday, December 28, 2009 5:27:58 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 12/15/2009
Posts: 86
Neurons: 264
Location: United States
You can either:

Could you please help Sue with her...and give me a feedback.

or

Please help Sue with her PC problem...and get back to me.

fruitjam
Posted: Tuesday, December 29, 2009 12:23:39 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/29/2009
Posts: 92
Neurons: 268
Thank you for your feedback. Much appreciated.

Respectfully yours,
Fj
fruitjam
Posted: Tuesday, December 29, 2009 12:36:18 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 10/29/2009
Posts: 92
Neurons: 268
Romany wrote:
Fruitjam - your use of the word "revert" is not quite correct. I am unaware of course of what your Dictionary source gave you for this word... but the correct sense of this word is to return to a previous state.

Christine's phrasing above where the word "feedback" was used was perfect, but if you want to retain your original construction you could say: - "...and get back to me with your feedback...".

The use of Please at the beginning of the sentence is not incorrect but is more a child's construction than an adult's. "Could you please help Sue out...." would be the more usual way to go.

The idiom "to help someone out" replaces the word "someone" with the person's name if we are referring to someone in particular.


Thank you for your advice.

I was keen on using "revert" as a verb where it means to "come back". In this case, what I meant to say is the following:

Quote:
Dear Barry,

Please could you help out Sue with her PC problem, and come back with your feedback on this issue.

Thanks.
Jamie


I was not aware that this was a child's manner of construction to use "Please" before. Angel But then it can be argued that I possess a child's knowledge insofar as English or as ESL is concerned. Angel

I have come across this particular type of construction elsewhere too. It is a puzzle as to which one to follow.

Respectfully yours,
Fj
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