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Schlook Inside
Posted: Wednesday, July 18, 2018 2:58:39 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 34,961
Neurons: 1,310,285
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
I had a nagging feeling that something was wrong.





Something kept on telling me it wasn't going right.






He won the lottery a week before he died.

“The lion doesn’t turn around when the small dog barks.” – African Proverb.
Audiendus
Posted: Wednesday, July 18, 2018 11:31:12 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 5,085
Neurons: 906,333
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
He hit the jackpot just a few days before his death.


The dosage stated on this prescription is lethal.
Schlook Inside
Posted: Thursday, July 19, 2018 2:37:16 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 34,961
Neurons: 1,310,285
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
The amount of medicine prescribed would kill you.




After his failed attempt of piracy,he wallked all the way back to Canada.

“The lion doesn’t turn around when the small dog barks.” – African Proverb.
Audiendus
Posted: Saturday, July 21, 2018 9:35:20 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 5,085
Neurons: 906,333
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
After his unsuccessful buccaneering antics, he made a long trek back to the land of the Maple Leaf.


We were astonished to find that the safe was empty.
Schlook Inside
Posted: Sunday, July 22, 2018 12:24:57 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 34,961
Neurons: 1,310,285
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
It came to us as a big surprise to see the safe had nothing in it.





The March of Dimes as become the March of Dollars.

“The lion doesn’t turn around when the small dog barks.” – African Proverb.
Hope123
Posted: Sunday, July 22, 2018 8:45:03 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 3/23/2015
Posts: 8,145
Neurons: 46,877
Location: Burlington, Ontario, Canada
The charity for mothers and children has had to change its name because of inflation over the years.

The fan just keeps on revolving.

Elitism is the slur directed at merit by mediocrity. -Sydney J. Harris, journalist (14 Sep 1917-1986)
Schlook Inside
Posted: Monday, July 23, 2018 2:32:17 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 34,961
Neurons: 1,310,285
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
The ventilator just keeps on spinning round and round.






Your ship just came in.

“The lion doesn’t turn around when the small dog barks.” – African Proverb.
Audiendus
Posted: Saturday, July 28, 2018 1:14:32 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 5,085
Neurons: 906,333
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
You've just hit the jackpot.


You shouldn't speak to her in that tone of voice.
Schlook Inside
Posted: Saturday, July 28, 2018 12:13:32 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 34,961
Neurons: 1,310,285
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
I would advise you not to address her with that attitude.





The mad cow has been cured.

“The lion doesn’t turn around when the small dog barks.” – African Proverb.
Audiendus
Posted: Monday, July 30, 2018 12:18:44 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 5,085
Neurons: 906,333
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
The cow formerly suffering from bovine spongiform encephalopathy has now been restored to sanity.


We've just torpedoed one of our own ships, sir.
Schlook Inside
Posted: Thursday, August 9, 2018 1:43:12 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 34,961
Neurons: 1,310,285
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
Just a minute ago,we blew up one of our own boats,captain.





The pink dolphin as been put on the endangered species list.

“The lion doesn’t turn around when the small dog barks.” – African Proverb.
Audiendus
Posted: Friday, August 10, 2018 9:51:51 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 5,085
Neurons: 906,333
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
Delphinus roseus has been declared a species in danger of extinction.


The police officer confiscated the child's water pistol.
Hope123
Posted: Saturday, August 11, 2018 6:05:55 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 3/23/2015
Posts: 8,145
Neurons: 46,877
Location: Burlington, Ontario, Canada
The constable took away the youngster's gun that contained H20.

Certain plants are good at cleansing the air.




Elitism is the slur directed at merit by mediocrity. -Sydney J. Harris, journalist (14 Sep 1917-1986)
Audiendus
Posted: Monday, August 20, 2018 8:25:57 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 5,085
Neurons: 906,333
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
Some flora are efficient at removing impurities from the atmosphere.


The instructions for this machine are impossible to understand.
Schlook Inside
Posted: Tuesday, August 21, 2018 12:15:31 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 34,961
Neurons: 1,310,285
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
The hand book for this mechanical contraption is difficult to comprehend.





Everybody loves you when your are an ice-cream truck driver.

“The lion doesn’t turn around when the small dog barks.” – African Proverb.
Hope123
Posted: Sunday, August 26, 2018 9:46:47 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 3/23/2015
Posts: 8,145
Neurons: 46,877
Location: Burlington, Ontario, Canada
It's not hard to have friends when the truck you drive around has a bell on it screaming "Chocolate or vanilla!"

The waiting is the hard part.

Elitism is the slur directed at merit by mediocrity. -Sydney J. Harris, journalist (14 Sep 1917-1986)
Schlook Inside
Posted: Monday, August 27, 2018 4:17:58 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 34,961
Neurons: 1,310,285
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
To most difficult of it all is the waiting.






We just made some delicious chop suey.

“The lion doesn’t turn around when the small dog barks.” – African Proverb.
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