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Schlook Inside
Posted: Thursday, March 22, 2018 4:15:53 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 33,717
Neurons: 1,216,526
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
I figure you don't typewrite anymore.




Where does paper come from grandpa ?

"Be kind everyone is fighting a hard battle"
El-Jefe
Posted: Sunday, March 25, 2018 5:31:52 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 3/7/2017
Posts: 124
Neurons: 26,615
Location: Kuwait City, Al Asimah Governorate, Kuwait
Hey old man, what are papers made out of?


The waitress still didn't take our order!

...but why?
Luker4
Posted: Sunday, March 25, 2018 7:13:57 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 11/19/2013
Posts: 4,213
Neurons: 23,388
Location: Wrocław Pracze, Lower Silesian Voivodeship, Poland
That woman keeps ignoring us.






So what's new anyway ?


Schlook Inside
Posted: Thursday, March 29, 2018 1:47:07 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 33,717
Neurons: 1,216,526
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
What have you been doing lately?








I went for a complete check up.

"Be kind everyone is fighting a hard battle"
IMcRout
Posted: Saturday, March 31, 2018 3:00:47 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,204
Neurons: 546,023
Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
I made the doctor do the full monty this time.


The Easter Bunny has given notice over here. S/He's snowed in.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. (Anon)
Schlook Inside
Posted: Sunday, April 1, 2018 12:13:52 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 33,717
Neurons: 1,216,526
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
This just in,there will be no easter egg hunt this year,due to the extreme weather forecast.









Looks like the jolly snowman will be filling in for the bunny.

"Be kind everyone is fighting a hard battle"
Audiendus
Posted: Wednesday, April 18, 2018 10:01:03 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 4,814
Neurons: 855,281
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
It seems that Easter will be a winter festival this year.


Please fasten your seat belts, as we are expecting severe air turbulence.
Schlook Inside
Posted: Wednesday, April 18, 2018 3:29:47 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 33,717
Neurons: 1,216,526
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
Hold on to your hats,the plane will be shaking any minute from now on.








Alas the glass was half empty this time.

"Be kind everyone is fighting a hard battle"
Audiendus
Posted: Friday, April 20, 2018 7:55:56 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 4,814
Neurons: 855,281
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
Pessimism prevailed on this occasion.


She is all right once you get to know her.
IMcRout
Posted: Saturday, April 21, 2018 5:09:32 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,204
Neurons: 546,023
Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
She'll grow on you once you get more intimate.


In these parts the asparagus harvest ends at the feast of Saint John the Baptist.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. (Anon)
Audiendus
Posted: Monday, April 23, 2018 7:54:40 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 4,814
Neurons: 855,281
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
Here the harvesting of Asparagus officinalis terminates on 24th June.


Zero is an even number.
Audiendus
Posted: Saturday, April 28, 2018 8:37:16 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 4,814
Neurons: 855,281
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
Nought is divisible by two without a remainder.


I found a long-forgotten suitcase in the attic.
Audiendus
Posted: Monday, May 7, 2018 11:49:08 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 4,814
Neurons: 855,281
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
In the loft, I discovered an old valise which nobody knew was there.


You wouldn't believe what some people get up to.
Schlook Inside
Posted: Monday, May 7, 2018 4:24:49 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 33,717
Neurons: 1,216,526
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
Its incredulous to see what folks rise up for.






The absent minded genius discovered a remedy for amnesia.

"Be kind everyone is fighting a hard battle"
Hope123
Posted: Thursday, May 10, 2018 7:51:12 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 3/23/2015
Posts: 7,670
Neurons: 44,303
Location: Burlington, Ontario, Canada
The unmindful mensa member cured forgetfulness.

I wish it were true.

A man must be excessively stupid, as well as uncharitable, who believes there is no virtue but on his own side. Addison
IMcRout
Posted: Friday, May 11, 2018 9:53:16 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,204
Neurons: 546,023
Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
Fat chance!


Precipitation in Spain now favours the hills.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. (Anon)
Audiendus
Posted: Friday, May 11, 2018 8:21:40 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 4,814
Neurons: 855,281
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
Precipitation in the Spanish nation falls mainly at elevation.


More's the pity.
Schlook Inside
Posted: Sunday, May 13, 2018 2:27:55 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 33,717
Neurons: 1,216,526
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
Sorry to hear that.





The judge was sent to jail.


"Be kind everyone is fighting a hard battle"
Audiendus
Posted: Sunday, May 13, 2018 8:49:40 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 4,814
Neurons: 855,281
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
The Recorder was incarcerated.


Some people regard any criticism as a personal insult.
Luker4
Posted: Thursday, May 17, 2018 1:51:20 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 11/19/2013
Posts: 4,213
Neurons: 23,388
Location: Wrocław Pracze, Lower Silesian Voivodeship, Poland
Some people don't appreciate the value of negative feedback.





I bought the CDs by myself.
Schlook Inside
Posted: Thursday, May 17, 2018 1:33:46 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 33,717
Neurons: 1,216,526
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
I purchased the CDs all by my lonesome.






The classy woman married a bum.

"Be kind everyone is fighting a hard battle"
Hope123
Posted: Saturday, May 19, 2018 10:56:54 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 3/23/2015
Posts: 7,670
Neurons: 44,303
Location: Burlington, Ontario, Canada
The lady married a shiftless man.

Lemon candy is tasty.

A man must be excessively stupid, as well as uncharitable, who believes there is no virtue but on his own side. Addison
Schlook Inside
Posted: Monday, May 21, 2018 3:33:16 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 33,717
Neurons: 1,216,526
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
I enjoy eating citrus flavored sweets.


He is a self taught musician.

"Be kind everyone is fighting a hard battle"
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