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Although the invitation seemed strange, even from someone like Options
Nikitus
Posted: Friday, November 17, 2017 7:35:33 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/17/2013
Posts: 277
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Location: Viña del Mar, Valparaiso, Chile
Hello.

First of all, thanks for all your time and help to improve my written english.

I want to ask about the following



Although the invitation seemed strange, even from someone like the hobo, Tim decided to go along, walking with him in the middle of the night towards an unknown destination, since at that moment it was fundamental to obtain necessary answers in order to understand everything related to the old theater.




Is it correct to use "Although the invitation seemed strange, even from someone like the hobo, Tim decided to go along

Is it correct to use "walking with him in the middle of the night towards an unknown destination"

Is it correct to use "since at that moment it was fundamental to obtain necessary answers in order to understand everything related to the old theater."


Thanks.
Romany
Posted: Friday, November 17, 2017 8:53:17 AM
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Joined: 6/14/2009
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Location: Brighton, England, United Kingdom

Nikitus - Even though you break it down into separate questions, you are usually asking for the meaning of the entire text. Thus all we are doing is translating - which doesn't help to learn English.

I would suggest you use much simpler books where you have more of a chance of understanding. These are all very complex sentences and they all deal with different aspects of English composition and syntax. Try texts like those on BBC Learning English. They are picked especially for learners and match the different levels of learners with texts that are clear and simple.
Nikitus
Posted: Friday, November 17, 2017 10:19:58 AM

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Location: Viña del Mar, Valparaiso, Chile
Dear Romany:

First of all, thanks for your help.

There are not books. There are sentences that I wrote.

I have grammatical problems.

Thanks.
Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Friday, November 17, 2017 10:35:27 AM

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Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom
Hi Nikitus.

This one is OK. It is grammatically good, I think.

I'm a little uncertain whether you mean exactly what you say in the last section, though.

There are two very similar clauses with different meanings.

1. "at that moment it was fundamental to obtain necessary answers in order to understand everything related to the old theatre."
This would mean that obtaining the necessary answers would make it possible to understand the old theatre.

2. "at that moment it was fundamental to obtaining necessary answers in order to understand everything related to the old theater."
This means that 'it' (walking with the hobo in the middle of the night towards an unknown destination) was an important first step towards obtaining the necessary answers.

Both make sense, but, if you mean the first one, I would swap the phrases around.

"at that moment obtaining necessary answers in order to understand everything related to the old theatre was fundamental."

***********
I'm not sure about all the commas - my knowledge of the 'rules' of punctuation is not very good.

I think I might change the one after "go along" to a dash - but don't take that as correct!


Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
Nikitus
Posted: Friday, November 17, 2017 11:23:59 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/17/2013
Posts: 277
Neurons: 1,311
Location: Viña del Mar, Valparaiso, Chile
Dear Drag0nspeaker:

Once again, thanks for your time and help.

Tim remembered some old news about intentions to demolish the old theater of the city to construct a building. He needed to know information about what happened with the shareholders that control the old theater, when it would be the assembly to make the decision, which would happen eventually with the municipal permits and other related issues



Thanks.

Wilmar (USA)
Posted: Friday, November 17, 2017 1:16:19 PM

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I would like to offer a suggestion, since you wrote this sentence. Please write shorter sentences. The one you offer here contains too much information for a single sentence.
Romany
Posted: Friday, November 17, 2017 2:25:09 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/14/2009
Posts: 13,345
Neurons: 40,668
Location: Brighton, England, United Kingdom
Ah, Nikitus, I'm so sorry. I hadn't realised that you yourself were writing these sentences.



One of the reasons I thought they were from a book is that the writing is rather formal and old-fashioned - and part of the reason for that was related to what Wilmar says - the sentences are very long.

Now, when prose-writing you will find longer sentences than in newspapers, or emails etc. so the length might not quite matter so much.

BUT... the common purpose of a sentence is to express a thought. Literally: i.e. each sentence expresses one thought.Our ancestors appeared to be able to perfectly understand a sentence which went on for a third of a page.

But in modern English that's the syntax we are used to. So when different thoughts occupy the same sentence we get confused; and have to go back and read the sentence again.

For instance " walking with him in the middle of the night towards an unknown destination" is great! It brings the whole scene to life and it uses simple language to be evocative.

But it's absolutely lost in a torrent of thoughts about hobos and invitations and orders and theatres.

(This is not criticising your work - it's just a tip about writing in English. To make up for miss-directing you to simplified texts!)
NKM
Posted: Friday, November 17, 2017 3:21:16 PM

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Location: Corinth, New York, United States
As Romany says, very long sentences can be distracting to the reader. Might I suggest:

Although the invitation seemed strange, even from someone like the hobo, Tim decided to go along, walking with him in the middle of the night towards an unknown destination. At that moment it was important to obtain information in order to understand everything related to the old theater, and this hobo might have some of the answers he needed.

FounDit
Posted: Friday, November 17, 2017 3:31:22 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/19/2011
Posts: 8,306
Neurons: 44,413
Nikitus wrote:
Hello.

First of all, thanks for all your time and help to improve my written english.

I want to ask about the following




Tim decided to go along, walking with him in the middle of the night towards an unknown destination, since at that moment it was fundamental to obtain necessary answers in order to understand everything related to the old theater.



I first broke the sentences apart to explain what I thought was needed, but then decided to simply write it as I would say it, and hope that it helps you see how a native might say it.

I begin by using your sentence explaining why Tim decided to go along, and then present the action of going along together.


"Since, at that moment, it was fundamental to obtain necessary answers in order to understand everything related to the old theater, Tim decided to accept the strange invitation from the hobo. Together, they walked through the night towards a destination unknown to Tim.


NKM made an excellent post while I was writing so you now have two ways of expressing the same ideas.

Thanks.


A great many people will think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. ~ William James ~
Nikitus
Posted: Saturday, November 18, 2017 9:27:19 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/17/2013
Posts: 277
Neurons: 1,311
Location: Viña del Mar, Valparaiso, Chile
I want to thank to all for your time and help.

Best Regards!
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