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It is not that the Englishman can't feel—it is that he is afraid to feel. He has been taught at his public school that... Options
Daemon
Posted: Saturday, October 31, 2015 12:00:00 AM
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It is not that the Englishman can't feel—it is that he is afraid to feel. He has been taught at his public school that feeling is bad form. He must not express great joy or sorrow, or even open his mouth too wide when he talks—his pipe might fall out if he did.

E. M. Forster (1879-1970)
RoadRunner
Posted: Saturday, October 31, 2015 1:07:52 AM

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So, this is what the English gentleman should be. I rather be a Californian, be free, be myself. Dancing
gerry
Posted: Saturday, October 31, 2015 2:04:48 AM
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In the old days the sun never set on the English Empire a great kingdom "no" god could not trust the English a night
Bully_rus
Posted: Saturday, October 31, 2015 4:08:44 AM
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It is rather disparaging notion, though a big fake smile is better, of course...
JMV
Posted: Saturday, October 31, 2015 4:28:50 AM

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Now we know what the stiff upper lip is for.
To keep the pipe in place.
It makes perfect sense.
Mehrdad77
Posted: Saturday, October 31, 2015 4:39:53 AM

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Even crushed against his brother in the Tube the average Englishman pretends desperately that he is alone.
Germaine Greer
Noufel Daikha
Posted: Saturday, October 31, 2015 5:18:31 AM

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What a reality!
Madas
Posted: Saturday, October 31, 2015 8:22:29 AM

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It is about like the politicians of the past - such as JFK, Charles de Gaulle, Khrouscthev, Adenauer. But now - Obama, Putin, Merkel - are you enjoying "joy or sorrow" of your deeds? The pipe might fall, eh?
Elsayyed Hassan
Posted: Saturday, October 31, 2015 9:12:17 AM

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Forster was born into an Anglo-Irish and Welsh middle-class family at 6 Melcombe Place, Dorset Square, London NW1, in a building that no longer exists. He was the only child of Alice Clara "Lily" (née Whichelo) and Edward Morgan Llewellyn Forster, an architect. His name was officially registered as Henry Morgan Forster, but at his baptism he was accidentally named Edward Morgan Forster.[2] To distinguish him from his father, he was always called Morgan. His father died of tuberculosis on 30 October 1880, before Morgan's second birthday.[3] Among Forster's ancestors were members of the Clapham Sect, a social reform group within the Church of England.

He inherited £8,000 (£794,520 as of 2015)[4] from his paternal great-aunt Marianne Thornton (daughter of the abolitionist Henry Thornton), who died on 5 November 1887.[5] The money was enough to live on and enabled him to become a writer. He attended Tonbridge School in Kent, as a day boy. The theatre at the school has been named in his honour.[6]

At King's College, Cambridge, between 1897 and 1901,[7] he became a member of a discussion society known as the Apostles (formally named the Cambridge Conversazione Society). Many of its members went on to constitute what came to be known as the Bloomsbury Group, of which Forster was a peripheral member in the 1910s and 1920s. There is a famous recreation of Forster's Cambridge at the beginning of The Longest Journey. The Schlegel sisters of Howards End are based to some degree on Vanessa and Virginia Stephens.[8]

After leaving university, he travelled in continental Europe with his mother. In 1914, he visited Egypt, Germany and India with the classicist Goldsworthy Lowes Dickinson, by which time he had written all but one of his novels.[9] In the First World War, as a conscientious objector, Forster volunteered for the International Red Cross, and served in Alexandria, Egypt.

Forster spent a second spell in India in the early 1920s as the private secretary to Tukojirao III, the Maharajah of Dewas. The Hill of Devi is his non-fictional account of this period. After returning to London from India, he completed his last novel, A Passage to India (1924), for which he won the James Tait Black Memorial Prize for fiction. He also edited Eliza Fay's (1756–1816) letters from India, in an edition first published in 1925.[10]
TheParser
Posted: Saturday, October 31, 2015 1:03:14 PM
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Daemon wrote:
He has been taught at his public school that feeling is bad form.


The situation is the reverse here in the United States.

Many individuals have no inhibitions whatsoever.

If they want to dress like a slob, they do it.
If they want to talk in a movie theater, they do it.
If they want to cut in line, they do it.
If they want to drive like savages, they do it.

Traditional American middle-class cultural values are fading very fast.

monamagda
Posted: Saturday, October 31, 2015 4:39:52 PM

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Context from : "ABINGER HARVEST (1936)"

PART I - THE PRESENT

CHAPTER I - NOTES ON THE ENGLISH CHARACTER


They go on quoting it because it expresses their sentiments ; they feel that if the Duke of Wellington didn't make it he ought to. have, and if he wasn't an Englishman he ought to have been. And they go forth into a world that is not entirely composed of public-school men or even of Anglo-Saxons, but of men who are as various as the sands of the sea ; into a world of whose richness and subtlety they have no conception. They go forth into it with welldeveloped bodies, fairly developed minds, and undeveloped hearts. And it is this undeveloped heart that is largely responsible for the difficulties of Englishmen abroad. An undeveloped heart -not a cold one. The difference is important, and on it my next note will be based.

For it is not that the Englishman can't feel-it is that he is afraid to feel. He has been taught at his public school that feeling is bad form. He must not express great joy or sorrow, or even open his mouth too wide when he talks-his pipe might fall out if he did. He must bottle up his emotions, or let them out only on a very special occasion.

Once upon a time (this is an anecdote) I went for a week's holiday on the Continent with an Indian friend. We both enjoyed ourselves and were sorry when the week was over, but on parting our behaviour was absolutely different. He was plunged in despair. He felt that because the holiday was over all happiness was over until the world ended. He could not express his sorrow too much. But in me the Englishman came out strong. I reflected that we should meet again in a month or two, and could write in the interval if we had anything to say ; and under these circumstances I could not see what there was to make a fuss about. It wasn't as if we were parting forever or dying. ` Buck up,' I said, ` do buck up.' He refused to buck up, and I left him plunged in gloom.

The conclusion of the anecdote is even more instructive. For when we met the next month our conversation threw a good deal of light on the English character. I began by scolding my friend. I told him that he had been wrong to feel and display so much emotion upon so slight an occasion ; that it was inappropriate. The word ' inappropriate ' roused him to fury. ` What ? ' he cried. ` Do you measure out your emotions as if they were potatoes ?' I did not like the simile of the potatoes, but after a moment's reflection I said, ' Yes, I do ; and what's more, I think I ought to. A small occasion demands a little emotion, just as a large occasion demands a great one. I would like my emotions to be appropriate. This may be measuring them like potatoes, but it is better than slopping them about like water from a pail, which is what you did.' He did not like the simile of the pail. ` If those are your opinions, they part us forever,' he cried, and left the room. Returning immediately, he added :` No-but your whole attitude toward emotion is wrong. Emotion has nothing to do with appropriateness. It matters only that it shall be sincere. I happened to feel deeply. I showed it. It doesn't matter whether I ought to have felt deeply or not.'

http://www.aaoldbooks.com/en-uk-us/Abinger_Harvest/default.asp
Robert Imgrat
Posted: Saturday, October 31, 2015 5:48:06 PM

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Stingy with details about Englishman in New York. Boo hoo!
johnfl
Posted: Saturday, October 31, 2015 7:30:01 PM

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A STIFF UPPER LIP IS MORE THAN LIKLEY TO HOLD YOUR PIPE IN PLACE.
Verbatim
Posted: Sunday, November 1, 2015 6:18:23 PM
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"It is not that the Englishman can't feel...
One Englishman.

...another Englishman:
"A man cannot be forever brooding on what is past nor on the tenuous connection between his own unwitting conduct and someone else's deliberately criminal behavior!"
From "Rites of Passage" by William Golding, 1980. All rights reserved. (Passage included)

pedro
Posted: Tuesday, November 3, 2015 4:58:42 AM

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FYI Only about 7% of children in England are educated in public schools (for non UK residents, 'public' = private) so this quote is directed at the minority who take their stiff upper lips, memories of 'fagging' and worse to go on and join the corridors of power so that they can take out their pent up resentmenst on the hoi polloi lucky enough to be raised in state schools.
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