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Confusing sentences Options
Koh Elaine
Posted: Sunday, April 16, 2017 3:48:29 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 7/4/2012
Posts: 1,861
Neurons: 7,684
(The paragraph is from a Buddhist magazine.)

This is a continuation from an earlier post. As that post has become quite "messy", I have reproduced the full paragraph below. Under that paragraph is my reworded version.

Please check whether there are errors in my version. Many thanks.

Regarding “the four forms of birth”, I think all of you already know that there are the four forms of birth: birth from eggs, birth from moisture, birth from the womb and birth by transformation. There are the four types of living beings that are born from eggs; born from damp and humid moisture; the so-called birth from the womb, of which living beings are born from the womb of their mother in biological forms such as human and other animals; and birth by transformation, of which living beings are not born through biological ways, but come into existence suddenly due to a certain cause and karmic relation.

My version:

There are the four forms of birth: birth from eggs, birth from moisture, birth from the womb and birth by transformation. Hence, there are the four types of living beings: they are born from eggs; born from damp and humid moisture; born from the wombs of the mothers of living things including human and other animals; and birth by transformation, in which case, the living beings are not born through biological ways, but come into existence suddenly due to a certain cause and karmic relation.
Morgaen
Posted: Sunday, April 16, 2017 7:18:32 PM

Rank: Newbie

Joined: 2/11/2017
Posts: 38
Neurons: 11,423
Location: Knock, Connaught, Ireland
I'd get rid of the in "There are the four forms of" and "there are the four types of".
Thus:
There are four forms of... and there are four types of...

I have no knowledge about this other thread you refer to.
Koh Elaine
Posted: Monday, April 17, 2017 5:06:27 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 7/4/2012
Posts: 1,861
Neurons: 7,684
Morgaen wrote:
I'd get rid of the in "There are the four forms of" and "there are the four types of".
Thus:
There are four forms of... and there are four types of...

I have no knowledge about this other thread you refer to.


This is the link to the other thread:

http://forum.thefreedictionary.com/postst164137_Confusing-sentence.aspx
FounDit
Posted: Monday, April 17, 2017 11:22:31 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/19/2011
Posts: 7,912
Neurons: 41,921
Koh Elaine wrote:
(The paragraph is from a Buddhist magazine.)

This is a continuation from an earlier post. As that post has become quite "messy", I have reproduced the full paragraph below. Under that paragraph is my reworded version.

Please check whether there are errors in my version. Many thanks.

Regarding “the four forms of birth”, I think all of you already know that there are the four forms of birth: birth from eggs, birth from moisture, birth from the womb and birth by transformation. There are the four types of living beings that are born from eggs; born from damp and humid moisture; the so-called birth from the womb, of which living beings are born from the womb of their mother in biological forms such as human and other animals; and birth by transformation, of which living beings are not born through biological ways, but come into existence suddenly due to a certain cause and karmic relation.

My version:
Your version is very good, but I'd add a few words:
There are the four forms of birth: birth from eggs, birth from moisture, birth from the womb and birth by transformation. Hence, there are the four types of living beings: those born from eggs; those born from damp and humid moisture; those born from the wombs of the mothers of living things including humans and other animals; and those born by transformation, in which case, the living beings are not born through biological ways, but come into existence suddenly due to a certain cause and karmic relation.


A great many people will think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. ~ William James ~
Koh Elaine
Posted: Monday, April 17, 2017 12:06:16 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 7/4/2012
Posts: 1,861
Neurons: 7,684
Thanks, FounDit, for your amendments.
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