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Atatürk
Posted: Thursday, November 8, 2018 11:21:17 AM
Rank: Newbie

Joined: 10/25/2018
Posts: 60
Neurons: 214
These interventions have been particularly effective for treating matters like the lack of commitment and obligation, positive affect, and meaning-in-life — which together mark a depressed mood. Some research studies also show that positive psychotherapy, both in individual and group situations, has improved health and alleviated depression to a meaningful degree. Moreover, it has been found that exerting a high level of try and effort to practice a happiness-increasing strategy (even after the intervention program) has improved health and reduced depression. (Lyubomirsky, et al., 2011).

Would you have any improvements to the above?
FounDit
Posted: Thursday, November 8, 2018 12:02:50 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/19/2011
Posts: 9,707
Neurons: 51,295
Atatürk wrote:

I suggest omitting two words.

These interventions have been particularly effective for treating matters like the lack of commitment and obligation, positive affect, and meaning-in-life — which together mark a depressed mood. Some research studies also show that positive psychotherapy, both in individual and group situations, has improved health and alleviated depression to a meaningful degree. Moreover, it has been found that exerting a high level of try and effort to practice a happiness-increasing strategy (even after the intervention program) has improved health and reduced depression. (Lyubomirsky, et al., 2011).

Would you have any improvements to the above?


We should look to the past to learn from it, not destroy our future because of it — FounDit
Romany
Posted: Thursday, November 8, 2018 12:31:53 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/14/2009
Posts: 14,529
Neurons: 45,380
Location: Brighton, England, United Kingdom
Ataturk -

This, like the last few, sound as though they are translations? Are you looking at existing translations to see if they need modifying? Because, if so, there is no one perfect answer. Yes, there are grammatical and vocabulary errors in these passages. But the main thing is that, even if each of these were corrected, it still doesn't "feel" like an English sentence.

THAT'S the thing that's the biggest differences: all languages have various language conventions that everyone follows whether "educated" or not. The balance between multi-syllabled words and two syllable words for example.The way sentences that are too long and crowded are used.the way certain words sound pleasing together.

Think about all the languages you have ever heard spoken.Perhaps one was Japanese and the other was Scandinavian? You, and those who don't know a word of Japanese, or a single sound in Swedish, on hearing both, would be able to distinguish which was which. Because of the rythm of each language.

I'd say that if you want to learn/absorb that rhythm you should read more authentic, contemporary sources like English-language books, magazines/newspapers. One good way to hear the rhythm of any language is through theatre. Because it's intended to reach hundreds of people of unknown linguistic abilities it is usually performed a little slower than in films, and actors are voice-trained to give full value to all the vowels; as well as heightened emphasis to some words. Unlike script-writers; play-writers are able to veto any changes to the words.

The internet is full of English plays being performed, so it doesn't even have to cost anything!
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