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Is 'otherwise' redundant? Options
Koh Elaine
Posted: Wednesday, September 12, 2018 10:01:21 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 7/4/2012
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The elderly woman immediately notified a 43-year-old cleaner in the area who contacted the police. The police, who received a call for assistance around 2am, arrived at the scene and brought a thin-looking man out of the otherwise empty bin. The man’s clothes were beside the bin.

1. Is "otherwise" redundant.
2. Should it be "at around" instead?

Thanks.


Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Wednesday, September 12, 2018 10:16:16 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/12/2011
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Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom
HI!
That sounds very gory! (Bodies in waste bins!)

I don't think that "otherwise" is redundant. You can't bring a body out of an empty bin (unless you are a magician).

I would prefer "at around 2am".
Informally, in conversation I may use "He took the call around 2am."

Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
Koh Elaine
Posted: Wednesday, September 12, 2018 10:33:31 AM
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Joined: 7/4/2012
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Thanks, DragOnspeaker.
Islami
Posted: Wednesday, September 12, 2018 12:01:06 PM
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Joined: 7/21/2017
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Drago Sir, is 'thin man' not enough instead of 'thin-looking man'? Your opinion please.

Just because the writer of an article is British doesn't mean that they use English correctly-DragOnspeaker.
Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Wednesday, September 12, 2018 12:15:02 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/12/2011
Posts: 30,418
Neurons: 179,538
Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom
Hi Islami.

You have a good point.
It depends on your story and how you write it. The normal phrase would be 'thin man', probably.

Yes - 'thin man' describes the man quite well but you (as a storyteller) may want to (somehow) create some mystery around the fact that he was not REALLY thin - he was very tall which made him "thin-looking".


Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
RuthP
Posted: Wednesday, September 12, 2018 10:16:28 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/2/2009
Posts: 5,150
Neurons: 57,606
Location: Drain, Oregon, United States
Drag0nspeaker wrote:
HI!
That sounds very gory! (Bodies in waste bins!)

I don't think that "otherwise" is redundant. You can't bring a body out of an empty bin (unless you are a magician).

I would prefer "at around 2am".
Informally, in conversation I may use "He took the call around 2am."

Are you sure this was a body? I mean, perhaps he's just off his meds. He took his clothing off, crawled in the bin, and went to sleep. Think
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