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Amybal
Posted: Thursday, July 12, 2018 6:02:13 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 2/8/2018
Posts: 422
Neurons: 2,288
Hi, do you see anything grammatically wrong in thess line?

Short summary
A man reunites with his family after his return from the mental asylum and the family manages an abnormal guest house where they torture the visiting guests and ends up killing them.

Long summay
A bad breakup leads to a man turning psychotic and he has to be admitted into a mental asylum. After his release, he reunites with his family. The four of them now manage a guest house located in the forest. It's not a normal guest house, however, as guests who stay they end up getting tortured and killed by the family.
FounDit
Posted: Thursday, July 12, 2018 11:21:04 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/19/2011
Posts: 9,844
Neurons: 51,787
Amybal wrote:
Hi, do you see anything grammatically wrong in thess line?
I would reword the Short Summary a bit to show his involvement better.

Short summary
A man reunites with his family after his return from a mental asylum and joins the family in managing an abnormal guest house where they torture and kill guests.

Long summay
A bad breakup leads to a man turning psychotic and he has to be admitted into a mental asylum. After his release, he reunites with his family. The four of them now manage a guest house located in the forest. It's not a normal guest house, however, as guests who stay there end up being tortured and killed by the family.


We should look to the past to learn from it, not destroy our future because of it — FounDit
Romany
Posted: Thursday, July 12, 2018 1:18:48 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/14/2009
Posts: 14,731
Neurons: 46,025
Location: Brighton, England, United Kingdom
OK, so you know what the first thing is I'm going to say, don't you? Yes, the very first sentence is too darn long! You've packed too much information into it: -

A man reunites with his family after his return from a mental facility. He and his family manage a guest house together, where together they torture and kill guests.

Foundit didn't remark on the word "asylum" so perhaps it's still used in America. Elsewhere, however, all places where people with mental illnesses are admitted are called 'facilities': nowadays the treatment of mental illness is varied and so are the places where they are treated.

But mainly I wanted to query your use of the word "breakup". Did you mean

a)that he and his partner ended their relationship in a very nasty way?
b) that he went do-lally (crazy) in such a severe way that he had to be admitted for treatment?

If you meant a) that's the correct word. But the information is completely irrelevant and should be omitted.
But if you meant b) that is a 'breakdown' - short form of "nervous breakdown".

Also, people don't "turn" psychotic. One is either born with genes markered with this possibility; or a long, slow process of external forces alter the make-up of the brain chemistry.
Amybal
Posted: Thursday, July 12, 2018 11:19:57 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 2/8/2018
Posts: 422
Neurons: 2,288
Thank you,

I do have one question.. Are you saying "facility" is a place for a particular purpose, perhaps for a treatment?

The reason I used "asylum" because he just return from a mental hospital.

FounDit
Posted: Friday, July 13, 2018 10:56:57 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/19/2011
Posts: 9,844
Neurons: 51,787
Amybal wrote:
Thank you,

I do have one question.. Are you saying "facility" is a place for a particular purpose, perhaps for a treatment?

The reason I used "asylum" because he just return from a mental hospital.

Romany wondered if "asylum" is still used in America, and the answer is, Yes. We even have people showing up at our borders asking for asylum, and they are called "asylum seekers".

The word still retains the traditional meaning of "safety" or "security" here. There is, however, an effort to change words that some find offensive, or uncomfortable. But if the meaning of asylum has changed, I haven't heard of it yet.

So a mental asylum provided safety both for the patient and for society at large for any who might be a danger to others. But because treatment for mental patients in earlier times was often horrific, since mental illness was poorly understood, some people link those two things together and find the word itself objectionable.


We should look to the past to learn from it, not destroy our future because of it — FounDit
Romany
Posted: Friday, July 13, 2018 2:31:15 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/14/2009
Posts: 14,731
Neurons: 46,025
Location: Brighton, England, United Kingdom
Amybal,

I think Foundit misunderstood: yes, the word "asylum" is still used in the same way as he demonstrated - "asylum seekers" are a feature of life in all Western Countries.

However, as we were talking about places where people with mental illnesses are treated, I was pointing out that we don't call those Asylums any more. It would appear from Foundit's response that there are only some people who don't do so in America. So I guess they are still officially referred to in that way by those working in the mental health field, as well as the public.

Sometimes people are treated in special wards in ordinary hospitals; some are treated in Sheltered Housing; some - mainly the wealthy - go to hotel-like places; others still go to small houses in the middle of the suburbs that only administer to 3 or 4 patients; some live together in an ordinary house with visiting doctors/nurses who do not live-in; others in hostels... as I said, different ways of treating different people with different mental illnesses - and at different stages of their illness.

So it's really weird to say "He's in a mental house now." "She's living in a mental hostel for the next 3 weeks." "They both were in the same mental block of flats".

We just use the word "facility" because it can refer to any place where a patient receives treatment. After all, if one's sibling, friend, parent, TV personality had to receive treatment for a mental problem, THAT would be the important information. Whether they were treated in a ward, or hospital or flat isn't the point: they've become mentally ill and need professional treatment in some kind of "facility".
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