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Hello respected teachers,
The Navajo singer sweeps the send painting away. Then he Returns the sand to the landscape.
I want to change the second sentence into a participle and merge it into the first one. Is the following okay?
The Navajo singer sweeps the sand painting away, then returning the sand to the landscape.
I think "then" is redundant there, however.
The custom of speaking is the original and only just standard of any language. Joseph Priestly- Rudiments of EG, 1761.
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Yes - the "returning" phrase shows that the action occurs along with "sweeps the sand painting away".
The two actions are together (basically they happen at the same time or, at least, in the same time-period).
"Then" is not really needed and does not fit well with the participle phrase.
The Navajo singer sweeps the sand painting away, then returns the sand to the landscape.
The Navajo singer sweeps the sand painting away, returning the sand to the landscape.
Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
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Drag0nspeaker wrote:The Navajo singer sweeps the sand painting away, then returns the sand to the landscape.
The pedantic side of me considers that a comma splice. That side would insert an 'and' before the 'then.
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Same here, Bobshilling, but as far as I have searched about it, it has become too common both in speaking and writing to be able to call it an error.
But strictly speaking, yes, it's a comma splice sine "then" is not a conjunction there, but an adverb.
The custom of speaking is the original and only just standard of any language. Joseph Priestly- Rudiments of EG, 1761.
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D00M wrote:Same here, Bobshilling, but as far as I have searched about it, it has become too common both in speaking and writing to be able to call it an error. I did say 'the pedantic side of me'. I am old and old-fashioned enough not to write something like that, but I almost certainly say it. I would still call it an error for the sake of those learners who may be taking examinations in places where teachers/examiners might well deduct marks for such foul sins.
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Thanks for being knowledgeable and helpful, Bobshilling. You are certainly a perfect teacher.
The custom of speaking is the original and only just standard of any language. Joseph Priestly- Rudiments of EG, 1761.
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Actually, nobody's perfect. But BobShilling is certainly worth listening to. 
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Somehow, my teachers never mentioned "comma splices", this type of construction was never corrected (grammar school level, 1961 to 1966).
Thank you Bob.
Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
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BobShilling wrote:Drag0nspeaker wrote:The Navajo singer sweeps the sand painting away, then returns the sand to the landscape.
The pedantic side of me considers that a comma splice. That side would insert an 'and' before the 'then. Hmm...I wonder. Is it really a comma splice? A comma splice can normally be corrected by changing the comma to a full stop, dash or semicolon, but that is not the case here. The sentence 'feels' correct to me (note that there is no "he" before "returns"). It would not have crossed my mind that there might be something wrong with it.
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Audiendus wrote:
Hmm...I wonder. Is it really a comma splice? A comma splice can normally be corrected by changing the comma to a full stop, dash or semicolon, but that is not the case here.
The sentence 'feels' correct to me (note that there is no "he" before "returns"). It would not have crossed my mind that there might be something wrong with it.
Interesting. The more I read that sentence, the less incorrect it sounds to me.
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I'm with Audiendus on this one. I've never heard of a "comma splice", but there's nothing wrong with that sentence.
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Thanks for that link. It confirms what I had assumed what a "comma splice" must be.
I've probably used commas in that way (more or less), but only in forming a list of successive clauses.
"I came, I saw her, and all was lost."
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NKM wrote:I've probably used commas in that way (more or less), but only in forming a list of successive clauses.
"I came, I saw her, and all was lost." That is not really a comma splice, because "A, B and C" is correct in general (as is "A and B", but not "A, B" or "A, B, C"). Examples of true comma splices that I would find acceptable are: Man proposes, God disposes. It's not yours, it's mine. You win some, you lose some. Some like it, some don't.
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