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Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Friday, July 3, 2015 12:06:47 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/12/2011
Posts: 29,956
Neurons: 174,521
Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom

Dr. Seuss I've never read -
No cat of mine has hat on head!
On childrens' poems that casts no pall
I love to hear from Roald Dahl!

From tales of wolf and pigs we see
that 'rely on self' will keep you free.
Rely on others' moral sense
can oftentimes be kind of dense.

Even little girls so nice -
reported made of sugar and spice -
can sometimes be a little cruel
that little pig was just a fool.

When wolf came, pig called for her aid,
but didn't think she'd need be paid.
"The small girl smiles, her eyelid flickers
She whips a pistol from her knickers

She aims it at the creature's head
and BANG! BANG! BANG! she shoots him ... dead."
Besides the wolfskin coat she got,
a pigskin case is now her lot.

Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
Hope123
Posted: Monday, July 6, 2015 10:15:03 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 3/23/2015
Posts: 8,148
Neurons: 46,920
Location: Burlington, Ontario, Canada
Dragon, Applause Applause Applause

Fairy tales, no Dr. Seuss,
I began to think, "What the deuce?"
But chocolate I love so well,
So Roald Dahl, I think he's swell.

Elitism is the slur directed at merit by mediocrity. -Sydney J. Harris, journalist (14 Sep 1917-1986)
Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Wednesday, July 8, 2015 5:56:34 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/12/2011
Posts: 29,956
Neurons: 174,521
Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom
I realise that this thread was intended for work of our own pen, but I couldn't resist including this gem.

The poet has a little trouble sometimes with the number of syllabubbles in each line - but you have to admit that his sense of rhyme is fine.

William Topaz McGonagall wrote:
’TWAS in the month of December, and in the year 1883,
That a monster whale came to Dundee,
Resolved for a few days to sport and play,
And devour the small fishes in the silvery Tay.

So the monster whale did sport and play
Among the innocent little fishes in the beautiful Tay,
Until he was seen by some men one day,
And they resolved to catch him without delay.


If you wish to see more - here are his complete works.

Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
IMcRout
Posted: Wednesday, July 8, 2015 8:42:30 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 5/27/2011
Posts: 35,321
Neurons: 557,394
Location: Lübeck, Schleswig-Holstein, Germany
William Topaz McGonagall
wrote about sighting a whale far from Donegal.

He rhymed play and Dundee
with Tay and Eighty-Three

but neglected to relate
how the whale met his fate.

Thanks so much, Drag0n, for the introduction and the link. It's a treasure-trove for weirdoes like me.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger. (Anon)
Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Wednesday, July 8, 2015 8:50:23 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/12/2011
Posts: 29,956
Neurons: 174,521
Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom
It's a treasure-trove for weirdoes like me.

Probably why I like it.



Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
Audiendus
Posted: Saturday, July 18, 2015 7:21:55 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 5,085
Neurons: 907,398
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
Some poets write of love and passion,
in free or rhyming verse according to the fashion.
Some respond to Nature by waxing lyrical,
but others prefer to be snide and satirical.
In the past, many poems were deeply religious,
And Laureates' verse was grand and prestigious.
From the Emerald Isle came Heaney and Yeats;
Longfellow and Whitman hailed from the States.
Mainland Europe produced poets galore,
And Asia gave birth to Khayyam and Tagore.
Lewis Carroll wrote with ingenious levity,
As did Ogden Nash with more brevity.
Gerard Manley Hopkins was alliteratively intense,
While Gertrude Stein often made little sense.
Poets, like people in wider society,
Form a large group of great variety.
Audiendus
Posted: Wednesday, September 30, 2015 7:02:44 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 5,085
Neurons: 907,398
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
The vagaries of English spelling
Leave many baffled students yelling.
Likewise, the quirks of pronunciation
Cause them to cry out in frustration.
The basic rules are bad enough,
For they include some illogical stuff.
Ee and oo are not E and O pronounced long;
If you said them like that, you would be quite wrong.
In the late Middle Ages they began to drift,
Like other sounds in the Great Vowel Shift,
Towards a uniquely English form
Which native speakers accept as the norm.
Eu sounds like 'oo' – I don't know why –
And ai isn't said like the letter I.
When we move on to some irregular word,
The learner is tempted to shout "That's absurd!"
Most tongues in which words change their sound over history
Alter their spelling; but what is a mystery
Is why many English words keep their old orthography –
Maybe it's to do with British geography.
Silent or fickle letters abound,
And then, of course, there's the famous ough sound.
Anomalous place names are often still worse,
But they're beyond the scope of this present verse.
Luker4
Posted: Thursday, October 1, 2015 3:27:01 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 11/19/2013
Posts: 4,219
Neurons: 23,746
Location: Wrocław Pracze, Lower Silesian Voivodeship, Poland
Applause Dancing

I Keep forgetting about this thread,
I am most pleased that it's not dead.

If you have a whim,
go ahead and swim.

In this merry and extraordinary game,
The entertainment itself is to blame.


tootsie
Posted: Thursday, October 1, 2015 3:50:41 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/11/2010
Posts: 6,886
Neurons: 23,730

I usually only read, but wait - I feel the need to participate

I love this forum with all its decorum

its posters delight almost every night

and fill me with needing to just keep on reading

whatever you write leaves me feeling quite bright.





I'm not lost for I know where I am. But however, where I am may be lost. Winnie-the-Pooh
Audiendus
Posted: Sunday, November 22, 2015 10:07:38 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 5,085
Neurons: 907,398
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
The autumn weather here
Has been very mild for the time of year
Until a few days ago
When a north wind began to blow
Bringing an icy chill with sleety snow.
The steady progression
Of each Atlantic depression
Has been suddenly impeded
And the unseasonable warmth has receded,
Leaving us all to shiver
As the Arctic blasts deliver
Their gift of relentless cold
Like that which afflicted folk of old,
As described by poets in lofty or vernacular rhymes
In classical or Shakespearean times.
How grimly doth the winter's boreal gale
O'er ev'ry hill and snow-dight valley wail!
O let us hope that its unwelcome rule
Will moderate before the feast of Yule.
Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Monday, November 23, 2015 10:12:08 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/12/2011
Posts: 29,956
Neurons: 174,521
Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom
We complain of the weather when we need a warm hat,
but Britain's not really as bad as all that.
When here the raindrops are almost hard ice,
In Berlin frozen diesel's not nice.
We have a wind - blows down a few fences,
but Florida's hurricanes leave them defenseless.

"How you doing?" - "Oh, can't complain.
But I'd rather have sun than this awful rain."
"Oh, the sun's not too good, with my delicate skin,
a lobster can't beat the red state I'm in."
The Wintersmith tries to please everyone
By changing it hourly - and that's no fun.


Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Saturday, December 5, 2015 7:11:09 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/12/2011
Posts: 29,956
Neurons: 174,521
Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom

Hey Tootsie, Audiendus, Luke.
Two weeks! I thought I'd see a book,
But not one word of rhyme you say,
Maybe the Muse has gone away. . .



Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
Luker4
Posted: Sunday, December 6, 2015 4:14:23 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 11/19/2013
Posts: 4,219
Neurons: 23,746
Location: Wrocław Pracze, Lower Silesian Voivodeship, Poland
Muses come and go.
As they please, they flow.
inside our dreams, subconcious mind,
they leave gifts, treasures we can find.
Luker4
Posted: Monday, December 7, 2015 6:56:17 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 11/19/2013
Posts: 4,219
Neurons: 23,746
Location: Wrocław Pracze, Lower Silesian Voivodeship, Poland
[Luker4 wrote:]
Muses come and go.
As they please, they flow.
inside our dreams, subconscious mind,
they leave gifts, treasures we can find.


Brick wall
Audiendus
Posted: Wednesday, December 9, 2015 9:49:41 AM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 5,085
Neurons: 907,398
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
This verse
Is terse,
But I've been
Off the scene
To write
On another site
The odd bit
Of poetic wit,
Devising rhyme
In my spare time,
And making it scan
If I possibly can.
But now I'm back
To have a crack
At RPG
On TFD.
Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Sunday, December 13, 2015 12:36:39 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/12/2011
Posts: 29,956
Neurons: 174,521
Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom

Short lines are not a problem here,
so long as rhythm we can hear.
And spelling? Well, who really cares?
The prize will go to him who dares.
I know you're thinking, "Who dares what?"
It doesn't matter, not one jot.


Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
Audiendus
Posted: Monday, December 21, 2015 6:48:52 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 5,085
Neurons: 907,398
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
Now Christmas is near,
We should be of good cheer.
Just three days remain
And it's windy with rain,
So it's hard to keep dry
Though the temperature's high,
And Santa – poor fella –
Will need an umbrella
And boots for the mud
In case of a flood.
His presents may get
A little bit wet,
But there's no need to weep
As they're probably cheap.
He doesn't like greed
Because people in need
Would not think it funny
If those with the money
Were blessed by St Nick
Instead of the sick.
The relief of the poor
Is what Christmas is for,
So don't fill your bellies
But put on your wellies
And offer some charity
And festive hilarity.
Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Friday, February 26, 2016 12:15:54 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/12/2011
Posts: 29,956
Neurons: 174,521
Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom

Well, Christmas went as Christmas does,
The sales had the fancy shops abuzz.
Now its Feb, all dark and gloom,
You read the news and it's all doom.

I don't know which I feel's the worst;
False enthusiasm fit to burst
About Beyonce's latest dress,
or another celeb in a marital mess.

What really saps the strength - Oh my!
- is the constant cry "We're going to die".
Terrorists and bombs and global warming
The "Immigrants will swamp you" latest warning.

But then I look and see real life,
Not perfect - but not total strife.
Most people help folk, even strangers,
Don't believe all the headline's dangers.


Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
Audiendus
Posted: Thursday, March 10, 2016 7:14:23 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 5,085
Neurons: 907,398
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
We tend to think there's such a thing as absolute morality –
Some basic precepts that transcend particular locality,
Which, far from being products of historical contingency,
Persist through every period with undiminished stringency.

Alas, such anthropology turns out to be erroneous,
For what one age and place applauds, another deems felonious.
Are gladiators savages, or paragons of bravery?
What basis had good men of yore for justifying slavery?

The British law had never banned the hanging of a criminal,
Then suddenly the Zeitgeist changed – I think it was subliminal.
Well-mannered English jurists claimed the Rope was a barbarity.
('Twas different in the States, for there the unrefined have parity.)

The fierce, capricious Yahweh, venerated in antiquity,
Grew mellow and impartial, which befitted his ubiquity.
We now expect our Lord to stress the virtue of equality,
And (unlike Scottish Puritans) to smile on human jollity.

Our forebears baited animals, and tamed young boys by beating them;
Some cultures pleased their gods by killing children and then eating them.
The fascists praise brute strength as being vital to society,
But others find such violence at odds with Christian piety.

Since vice and virtue are perforce interpreted subjectively,
No scientific formula can capture them effectively.
We may invoke religion, whether active or residual,
But moral intuitions are entirely individual.
Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Tuesday, April 3, 2018 12:29:47 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/12/2011
Posts: 29,956
Neurons: 174,521
Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom
Rhymes are in season -
There is no real reason
but whimsy and magic
decide more than logic.

You may wish to write rhyme
or just feel you have time.
You don't have to make sense
But come down off the fence.

Just give it a try and
We'll give you a big hand.
Yes - give it a try.
There's no need to be shy.



Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
Audiendus
Posted: Monday, May 7, 2018 8:09:44 PM
Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 8/24/2011
Posts: 5,085
Neurons: 907,398
Location: London, England, United Kingdom
Some grammarians
Say we are antiquarians
Because we use established terminology
Without apology,
Often citing etymology.
Our narrow definition
Of 'clause' and 'preposition'
Is opposed by experts in linguistics
Armed with academic papers and statistics.
They classify words, without compunction,
By form rather than function,
Which some of us find risible,
As their form is already visible,
Whereas foreign learners want some clue
As to what the words actually do.
Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Tuesday, May 8, 2018 5:53:24 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/12/2011
Posts: 29,956
Neurons: 174,521
Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom
Dancing Applause Applause Applause Dancing Dancing

Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Tuesday, May 8, 2018 10:20:30 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/12/2011
Posts: 29,956
Neurons: 174,521
Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom
Yeah, words are fun
- it's good to pun.
Antonyms and synonyms
and maybe even homonyms.

But fun and play
are just that day.
Meanings may change,
as through years we range,
but you can't just decide
to resist the tide.

"All things are fluid"
sounds like a druid
incanting spells
as history tells.

"That phrase is a clause"
Well, it doesn't sound plaus-
ible. Where's its subject;
where's its predicate?
Definitions are not
really delicate.

A spade is a spade,
a shovel's a shovel.
Call one as the other
and you give yourself trouble.

My apologies for the awful rhymes - the rhythm isn't too good either !

Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Wednesday, June 20, 2018 6:59:56 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/12/2011
Posts: 29,956
Neurons: 174,521
Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom
It's time for some rhymes.
Or - a rhyme of the times.


Sun's high - the day's long.
At 3am, the bird's song
Awakens sleepers,
Oh! So early!

At 10pm - the sky's so light
the chance of sleep is so slight.
Can't go to bed.
It's too early!


Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
Luker4
Posted: Thursday, June 21, 2018 11:48:26 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 11/19/2013
Posts: 4,219
Neurons: 23,746
Location: Wrocław Pracze, Lower Silesian Voivodeship, Poland
Applause Applause Applause Applause


Drag0nspeaker
Posted: Wednesday, July 11, 2018 7:43:12 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/12/2011
Posts: 29,956
Neurons: 174,521
Location: Livingston, Scotland, United Kingdom
It's time, I think, that poems flowed.
I'll find a rhyme, I'll not be cowed.
Seems easy - it's not simple though,
rhymes don't, like fruit, drop from the bough.

Silenced d'oh!

Wyrd bið ful aræd - bull!
BobShilling
Posted: Wednesday, July 11, 2018 9:51:10 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 4/1/2018
Posts: 452
Neurons: 3,101
Location: Beroun, Stredocesky, Czech Republic
Audiendus wrote:
Some grammarians
Say we are antiquarians
Because we use established terminology
Without apology,
Often citing etymology.
Our narrow definition
Of 'clause' and 'preposition'
Is opposed by experts in linguistics
Armed with academic papers and statistics.
They classify words, without compunction,
By form rather than function,
Which some of us find risible,
As their form is already visible,
Whereas foreign learners want some clue
As to what the words actually do.


So Quirk et al can go to hell,
And H & P, thrice damned be ye!
I knows I can rely on me
Far more than on ye dons from hell.
Your many years of work and toil
Mean nowt against my schooldays lore.
I'll stick to things that I adore,
Your plots to change things I will foil.
Your books and papers I won't read
'Cos I know better - there's no need!


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