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Rank: Advanced Member
Joined: 9/17/2013
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Location: Viña del Mar, Valparaiso, Chile
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Hello.
First of all, thanks for all your help and time. Are the following sentences grammatically correct?
"The unusual low traffic between the two cities caused both women to arrive forty-five minutes earlier than planned. They decided entering the bar where they would met Tim, to recognize the land. Sue tried unsuccessfully to communicate with Mark's friend, while Liz approached the bar to ask for a drink."
Thanks.
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Rank: Newbie
Joined: 12/8/2014
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Location: Barcelona, Catalonia, Spain
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Well, it's kind of awkward, the second sentence. In any case "met" should be "meet".
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"The unusual low traffic between the two cities caused both women to arrive forty-five minutes earlier than planned. They decided entering the bar where they would met Tim, to recognize the land. Sue tried unsuccessfully to communicate with Mark's friend, while Liz approached the bar to ask for a drink."
Let me rephrase this sentence;
"The unusually low traffic between two cities caused both women to arrive forty-five minutes earlier than planned. They decided to enter the bar where they would meet Tim, to recognize the land. Sue tried unsuccessfully to communicate with Mark's friend (write name), while Liz approached the bar to ask for a drink."
Just because the writer of an article is British doesn't mean that they use English correctly-DragOnspeaker.
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Rank: Advanced Member
Joined: 9/19/2011
Posts: 9,036
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Nikitus wrote:
Hello.
First of all, thanks for all your help and time. Are the following sentences grammatically correct?
Traffic isn't "low", it is the amount of traffic that is low. The term "both women" isn't clear. Are they traveling separately or together? If they are together, and you have made that clear, then a better wording might be "caused them to arrive". Alternatively, if traveling together, you could say, "caused the two women to arrive".
The second sentence makes no sense. I don't know what "to recognize the land" means, or why the decided to do that while entering a bar.
"The unusually low amount of traffic between the two cities caused them/the two women to arrive forty-five minutes earlier than planned. They decided entering the bar where they would met Tim, to recognize the land. Sue tried unsuccessfully to communicate with Mark's friend, while Liz approached the bar to ask for a drink."
Thanks.
A great many people will think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. ~ William James ~
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Rank: Advanced Member
Joined: 9/17/2013
Posts: 329
Neurons: 1,591
Location: Viña del Mar, Valparaiso, Chile
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Dear Noé, Islami and FounDit:
Thanks for your help.
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Rank: Advanced Member
Joined: 9/17/2013
Posts: 329
Neurons: 1,591
Location: Viña del Mar, Valparaiso, Chile
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First of all, thanks for your help.FounDit wrote:Nikitus wrote:
Hello.
First of all, thanks for all your help and time. Are the following sentences grammatically correct?
Traffic isn't "low", it is the amount of traffic that is low. The term "both women" isn't clear. Are they traveling separately or together? If they are together, and you have made that clear, then a better wording might be "caused them to arrive". Alternatively, if traveling together, you could say, "caused the two women to arrive".
The second sentence makes no sense. I don't know what "to recognize the land" means, or why the decided to do that while entering a bar.
"The unusually low amount of traffic between the two cities caused them/the two women to arrive forty-five minutes earlier than planned. They decided entering the bar where they would met Tim, to recognize the land. Sue tried unsuccessfully to communicate with Mark's friend, while Liz approached the bar to ask for a drink."
Thanks.
I will try to rewrite the second sentence:
They decided to enter anyway to the bar where they would met Tim, to wait while he arrived. Sue tried unsuccessfully to communicate with Mark's friend, while Liz approached the bar to ask for a drink."
Thanks.
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Rank: Advanced Member
Joined: 9/19/2011
Posts: 9,036
Neurons: 48,436
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Nikitus wrote:First of all, thanks for your help.FounDit wrote:Nikitus wrote:
Hello.
First of all, thanks for all your help and time. Are the following sentences grammatically correct?
Traffic isn't "low", it is the amount of traffic that is low. The term "both women" isn't clear. Are they traveling separately or together? If they are together, and you have made that clear, then a better wording might be "caused them to arrive". Alternatively, if traveling together, you could say, "caused the two women to arrive".
The second sentence makes no sense. I don't know what "to recognize the land" means, or why the decided to do that while entering a bar.
"The unusually low amount of traffic between the two cities caused them/the two women to arrive forty-five minutes earlier than planned. They decided entering the bar where they would met Tim, to recognize the land. Sue tried unsuccessfully to communicate with Mark's friend, while Liz approached the bar to ask for a drink."
Thanks.
I will try to rewrite the second sentence:
Are we to assume the two women arrived at the bar 45 minutes earlier than they planned?
Also, have you told your reader that Mark's friend is already at the bar?
Is that is true, then it would be easier to say, "The unusually low amount of traffic between the two cities caused them/the two women to arrive at the bar forty-five minutes earlier than planned, and they decided to wait inside for Tim to arrive. While they waited, Sue tried unsuccessfully to communicate with Mark's friend, while Liz approached the bar to ask for a drink."
They decided to enter anyway to the bar where they would met Tim, to wait while he arrived. Sue tried unsuccessfully to communicate with Mark's friend, while Liz approached the bar to ask for a drink."
Thanks.
A great many people will think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. ~ William James ~
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Location: Wichita Falls, Texas, United States
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Just a quick addition: Traffic isn't "low"--it is "light" or "heavy," so the proper usage would be "The light traffic between the two cities..."
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Location: Jandiāla Guru, Punjab, India
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Rank: Advanced Member
Joined: 9/19/2011
Posts: 9,036
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Gabriel82 wrote:Just a quick addition: Traffic isn't "low"--it is "light" or "heavy," so the proper usage would be "The light traffic between the two cities..." That's true. Traffic can be light or heavy. Also, traffic can be of low volume or heavy/high volume. I've heard all of these used.
A great many people will think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. ~ William James ~
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