The Free Dictionary  
mailing list For webmasters
Welcome Guest Forum Search | Active Topics | Members

JOKE OF THE DAY Options
Schlook Inside
Posted: Tuesday, March 13, 2018 1:40:17 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 33,285
Neurons: 1,188,776
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada


"Be kind everyone is fighting a hard battle"
Schlook Inside
Posted: Thursday, March 29, 2018 3:59:07 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 33,285
Neurons: 1,188,776
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada
My psychiatrist told me to write letters to people I hate,then burn them.
Its done.
Now what do I do with the letters.

"Be kind everyone is fighting a hard battle"
jeans&sneakers
Posted: Friday, April 13, 2018 8:07:12 AM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 6/13/2011
Posts: 2,717
Neurons: 8,444
Location: Cavite, Calabarzon, Philippines

Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson decide to go on a camping trip. After dinner and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night, and go to sleep.

Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.

"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."

Watson replied, "I see millions of stars."

"What does that tell you?"

Watson pondered for a minute. "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo. Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three. Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant. What does it tell you, Holmes?

Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke: "Watson, you idi*t. Someone has stolen our tent!"


At the touch of love, everyone becomes a poet. Plato
jacobusmaximus
Posted: Saturday, April 14, 2018 4:32:54 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/17/2009
Posts: 11,220
Neurons: 385,025
Location: Glasgow, Scotland, United Kingdom
The wife nagged her husband into taking her mother with them on a safari holiday. They woke up one morning to find a lion had cornered the mother. "What shall we do!", Yelled the wife. "Nothing", said the husband. "The lion got himself into this mess..."

I remember, therefore I am.
Schlook Inside
Posted: Sunday, April 15, 2018 12:13:24 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 33,285
Neurons: 1,188,776
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada


"Be kind everyone is fighting a hard battle"
Schlook Inside
Posted: Sunday, April 15, 2018 12:21:15 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 4/27/2014
Posts: 33,285
Neurons: 1,188,776
Location: Montréal, Quebec, Canada


"Be kind everyone is fighting a hard battle"
Users browsing this topic
Guest


Forum Jump
You cannot post new topics in this forum.
You cannot reply to topics in this forum.
You cannot delete your posts in this forum.
You cannot edit your posts in this forum.
You cannot create polls in this forum.
You cannot vote in polls in this forum.

Main Forum RSS : RSS
Forum Terms and Guidelines. Copyright © 2008-2018 Farlex, Inc. All rights reserved.