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Amybal
Posted: Tuesday, April 10, 2018 3:41:37 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 2/8/2018
Posts: 76
Neurons: 459
Hi, do you see anything grammatically wrong in these sentences?

Short summary
Get ready for an action-packed concert of dancing, singing, jiggling and lots of fun, as Didi & Friends are ready to meet you with new episodes of songs and well-known songs of Didi & Friends.

Long summary
Hey kids! Now it's time to sing and dance with Didi & Friends. This concert features new episodes of songs and well-known songs of Didi & Friends. It is merrier with new faces including stars Siti Nurhaliza, Tomok, and Omar & Hana as special guests. Be entertained by the antics of Didi and his friends. Hora Horey!
FounDit
Posted: Tuesday, April 10, 2018 4:45:30 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/19/2011
Posts: 8,786
Neurons: 47,279
Amybal wrote:
Hi, do you see anything grammatically wrong in these sentences?
I have no idea what Didi and Friends look like, but the word "jiggling" usually has a negative connotation. It refers to fleshy body parts quivering with movement. However, this may be appropriate for them, so you will have to judge that use.

That said, I would change a few things.

Short summary
Get ready for an action-packed concert of dancing, singing, jiggling and lots of fun, as Didi & Friends are ready to entertain you with some new songs as well as some old, well-known favorites.

Long summary
Hey kids! Now it's time to sing and dance with Didi & Friends. This concert features some new songs as well as many of your old favorites. It is merrier, with new faces, including stars Siti, Nurhaliza, Tomok, and Omar & Hana as special guests. Be entertained by the antics of Didi and his friends. Hora Horey! (Is this a common expression in your culture? I ask because it looks like our words "hurrah" or "hurray")


A great many people will think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. ~ William James ~
Amybal
Posted: Wednesday, April 11, 2018 2:26:00 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 2/8/2018
Posts: 76
Neurons: 459
Hi FounDit,

Basically, Did and friends is kid songs and children's music, similar to Five Little Ducks, The Wheels On The Bus and etc. I used the word "jiggling" because it also refer as "movement". As you know most of the kid songs are full of fun and dance.Therefore I offer the catchy word.

Is this sound good?
Non-stop, energetic concert like no other with Didi & Friends
FounDit
Posted: Wednesday, April 11, 2018 12:56:02 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/19/2011
Posts: 8,786
Neurons: 47,279
Amybal wrote:
Hi FounDit,

Basically, Did and friends is kid songs and children's music, similar to Five Little Ducks, The Wheels On The Bus and etc. I used the word "jiggling" because it also refer as "movement". As you know most of the kid songs are full of fun and dance.Therefore I offer the catchy word.

Is this sound good? (Does this sound good? or Is this good?)
Yes, this will work. I would put it like this:
"Get ready for a non-stop, energetic concert like no other with Didi & Friends!"


A great many people will think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. ~ William James ~
Amybal
Posted: Thursday, April 12, 2018 3:27:42 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 2/8/2018
Posts: 76
Neurons: 459
Sorry I missed to answer for this: (Is this a common expression in your culture? I ask because it looks like our words "hurrah" or "hurray")
[/quote][/quote]

There is no such thing, we use those catchy words just to get an attention from the public/children. What does that mean in your culture?
Amybal
Posted: Thursday, April 12, 2018 5:55:16 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 2/8/2018
Posts: 76
Neurons: 459
(Does this sound good? Did I use the program title (Konsert Hora Horey Didi & Friends) quite often?

Go behind the scenes of Konsert Hora Horey Didi & Friends and watch a ton of behind the scene footages which also include on set interviews with the directors and cast of Konsert Hora Horey Didi & Friends.
FounDit
Posted: Thursday, April 12, 2018 8:14:12 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/19/2011
Posts: 8,786
Neurons: 47,279
Amybal wrote:
Sorry I missed to answer for this: (Is this a common expression in your culture? I ask because it looks like our words "hurrah" or "hurray")


There is no such thing, we use those catchy words just to get an attention from the public/children. What does that mean in your culture?


They are expressions used as an exclamation of happiness, exultation, appreciation, encouragement, or the like, or to cheer someone on in some activity.

Amybal wrote:

(Does this sound good? Did I use the program title (Konsert Hora Horey Didi & Friends) quite often?
There is enough between the two uses that it doesn't sound strange, but the second one could be omitted without a problem. Like this:

Go behind the scenes of Konsert Hora Horey Didi & Friends and watch a ton of behind the scenes footage which also includes on set interviews with the directors and cast of the show.





A great many people will think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. ~ William James ~
Amybal
Posted: Friday, April 13, 2018 3:23:10 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 2/8/2018
Posts: 76
Neurons: 459
Thank you :-) FounDit
Amybal
Posted: Tuesday, April 17, 2018 4:44:02 AM
Rank: Member

Joined: 2/8/2018
Posts: 76
Neurons: 459
Does this sound good?

Konsert Hora Horey Didi & Friends coloring book.
The book also features new characters from the Konsert Hora Horey, which are Abang Paan, Kak Hani and many more.
FounDit
Posted: Tuesday, April 17, 2018 12:51:10 PM

Rank: Advanced Member

Joined: 9/19/2011
Posts: 8,786
Neurons: 47,279
Amybal wrote:
Does this sound good?

Konsert Hora Horey Didi & Friends coloring book.
The book also features new characters from the Konsert Hora Horey, which are Abang Paan, Kak Hani and many more.


I would change "which" to "who are named" or simply, "named".

Konsert Hora Horey Didi & Friends coloring book.
The book also features new characters from the Konsert Hora Horey, who are named Abang Paan, Kak Hani, and many more.

Konsert Hora Horey Didi & Friends coloring book.
The book also features new characters from the Konsert Hora Horey, named Abang Paan, Kak Hani, and many more.


A great many people will think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices. ~ William James ~
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